...AH THINK AH'LL GO AN' EAT WORMS.

McMurdo and his disciples have outdone themselves this time. They're all ranting and raving about how everybody, and I do mean everybody, has got it in for them. Mad Merlin himself goes on about the Raynjurz-Haturz in the media and how they're all turning on Mike Ashley now. Apparently it's all some big conspiracy against Unionism. He says:

"There are various possible reasons but one is that it suits certain people for the UK to be divided by the virulent forces of nationalism. Here in Scotland the massive Rangers support has been a strong bastion of Unionism and pro-Britishness for over a hundred years. Obviously for Unionism to be kept under this bastion had to be put out of commission – a feat achieved by the recent woes suffered by the club and its fan base."

To prove his point he offers as evidence the supposed agenda against Ashley in the Telegraph. I mean...the Telegraph? Why would one of the most right-wing, Union Flag-waving papers in the country want to split up the UK? I've had a look at the articles in question and what it was really about was a Newcastle-supporting journalist worried about what's going to happen to his team now that Ashley has found a new toy. If Bisto FC manage to qualify for Europe in any way, shape or form, where does that leave United? Spokesmen for United (i.e. for Ashley) got in touch to call the journalist 'a liar', which has prompted a back-and-forth argument. It's got nothing to do with Unionism or whatever.

All the disciples join in, moaning about everybody having it in for the 'Protestant Unionist Loyalist' community. In other words, they're pissed off because the Orange Order no longer rules the roost in Scotland. They go on about not only football but the EU, Ulster, the Labour Party, the SNP and even trades unions to push their twisted view that the whole country's institutions have been infiltrated and taken over by 'outsiders'; and I think we all know who those 'outsiders' are.

Whenever they mention the peace process in Northern Ireland they always put the words in inverted commas to emphasise that they don't see it that way at all. To their minds all that has happened is that they're having to capitulate to Republicans. They're like white supremacists in South Africa, to whom all the problems in the country are there because the 'blecks' have taken over. Their mindset doesn't understand the concept of equality; either they're in charge or somebody else is. Concession is capitulation, compromise is defeat; any attempts at improving things have to be on their terms or not at all. And they're the same in Scotland; if they're not running things then there's something seriously wrong with the world.

They just can't accept that the days when the Church of Scotland wanted to repatriate Irish Catholics and discrimination was acceptable are long gone. The heavy industries over which they held sway have disappeared; no doubt Thatcher was part of the conspiracy against the 'PUL Community'! Many of the trades unions in Scotland were dominated by Orangemen and Freemasons and that has gone as well. The Boilermakers Union was notorious in this respect and many of them fought tooth-and-nail against amalgamation with the GMWU. Nowadays there is no special treatment for those in the Ludge and they can't accept it; if they're not getting preferential treatment then, in their eyes, somebody else must be getting it. One of McMurdo's disciples claims to have resigned from his union because it's now just looking after the interests of 'theym'.

Meanwhile, the 'Raynjurz-Hating' media has 'proof' of how bad the Celtic supporters are. The Sunday Post had a picture, one picture, of a lavvy door spray-painted with something about 'The 66'. It claims that this was at Tynecastle, among lots of other 'evidence' it says it saw but doesn't bother to show. Strangely, a few years back when some of The Peeppul destroyed a toilet at Celtic Park, while the police watched and did nothing, none of our media thought it worth mentioning.

And the good old Daily Record let us know that the Rangers (sic) Reporters Trust released a statement expressing their disgust over Celtic and its supporters. All the DR did was give the RST's hypocritical opinion with no comment and, of course, there are still no comments allowed by your ordinary punter. Why the hell is this pile of shite given such prominence in a newspaper? I can only imagine that the request to publish it was accompanied by threats of some kind; it is the 'Rangers' way, after all!

The DR also told yesterday of how the police are now looking into Chateau Charlie's 'takeover' at Ibrox, or 'Charles Green's buy-out of Ibrox club comes under the spotlight' as the Record would have it. Now why would a part of the 'Raynjurz-Hating' media try to perpetuate the Big Lie? The truth emerges, buried in the article: '£5.5m purchase of the club’s assets in a deal with administrators Duff and Phelps.' The police are apparently looking into the whole shady business and hopefully we'll finally get to hear some semblance of the truth when it all comes out in court!

A final thought from McMurdo: "...you cannot dispute that Rangers are hated. Which begs the question: Why? Surely the answer couldn’t be just plain old bigotry? Not in 2014 Scotland, surely…?" I'm afraid the answer is 'Yes', my dear Merlin; everybody hates your bigoted mob, hanging around like the smell from a putrefying corpse when it is 2014!

"Who the hell does that Ed Miliband think he is, going on about Victorian work practices? Victorian times was when England was great and had an empire and it's time we brought those days back. England didn't become great by paying out decent wages, you know! What's that? Britain? Of course; that's what I meant! It's the same thing, innit?"