LOST SOULS

The famous historian AJP Taylor once said that, at Nuremberg, they hanged a few middle-ranking Nazis and then assumed that the rest of Germany had been somewhere else at the time. The same thing seems to be happening at Ibrox. A few middling characters are being lined up to take the fall while the big boys get off Scot-free. The ridiculous warrant for old Barney Google's arrest and the supposed 'search' for him is all a red herring. Are we meant to believe that he jumped off a train on the Forth Bridge and is currently running across the glens, handcuffed to Madeleine Carroll, with the local police in hot pursuit? More likely he's laughing his arse off as he and Charlie sip Remy Martin in front of a roaring fire of £20 notes.

Rather strangely, The Peeppul are getting a bit excited over these arrests. Being the collective-mind solipsists they are, they cannot understand that there is an actual, real world outside Govan. Their logical, if you can call it that, thinking process is: four men have been arrested for fraud, these four men were connected to Rangers, ergo these four men must have defrauded Rangers. They have got so used to playing the victim that it cannot seem to penetrate their thick skulls that nobody defrauded Rangers. On the contrary, all the defrauding was actually done on behalf of the dead club.

Remember that season when Craig Whyte was the man in charge? He held back the PAYE of his employees mainly to be able to afford to put a team on the pitch. He didn't bother to hand over VAT for the same reason. Meanwhile, he had paid off Rangers' debt to the bank by borrowing money from Ticketus. Rangers, as it had been for years, was on very shaky foundations. But it would have worked if it hadn't been for that pesky Sooperally getting kicked out of Europe early.

So who suffered when Rangers ended up like an upside-down goldfish at the top of the bowl? Not Rangers. The assets were snapped up for a song and a new club started that was allowed to pretend to be a continuation of the old one. Meanwhile Ticketus, HMRC and many others were left to whistle for their cash.

So if these guys are hauled up in court for fraud, it can't possibly be for anything that was done to Rangers. The problem is, however, that all the blame for everything is going to be shifted onto their heads; unless, of course, they come to some kind of deal to hand over the ones behind it all. David Muray, Duff and Phelps, Charlie Boy etc should all be up before a judge. It won't happen though; I've no doubt that these guys have already been well paid to keep their mouths firmly shut!

Meanwhile, as I thought, the Derry Dinosaur Jockey, Gregory Campbell, is desperately looking for some way to appeal the decision vis-a-vis Celtic receiving 'state aid'. Does this guy ever actually do anything for his constituents? All he ever seems to be interested in is Celtic and getting South Korean cars renamed. And it seems that McMurdo and his disciples can't accept this decision that exonerates Celtic because it was made by 'Celtic's friends' in Europe. They're all riled to hell about it.

It's only just struck me that the whole thing has been a ruse all along. All this shite about Celtic and the GCC was probably made up, in the full knowledge that there was no evidence whatsoever and that the EC would clear Celtic of any wrongdoing. The Peeppul being as gullible as they are would obviously believe every word. Cue lots of anger and hatred directed at the EU. Now, who do you think this shower might vote for in next year's election? And remind me again which party McMurdo belongs to. The plot thickens!

And talking of thick, The Peeppul were all up in arms over a t-shirt being sold online by Burtons. The company that makes them is called 'Stolen Souls' and they obviously thought it would be a laugh to make a t-shirt with a 'Stolen Souls' football team. A quick Google search and they got hold of a picture of a Victorian football team. A couple of changes here and there (including removing a star - they wore kid-oan stars even then), a few skulls bunged onto the shoulders and - Hey Presto! - they've made a team of 'Lost Souls'. Unfortunately, however, they should have taken a closer look at which team the photo showed. Anyone else would have had a laugh at it, but not The Peeppul. This was a picture of the 'Gallunt Pie-In-Ears,' whom we are all supposed to venerate as if they were Old Testament prophets. The paranoid overreaction of The Peeppul to this t-shirt was hilarious to behold. Mark Dingwall, of FollowFollow, told the Daily Record, "The obsession of fans of other football clubs with Rangers points to it being someone with a very unpleasant agenda." Christ, you daren't say anything! No doubt they'd think my 39 Steps allusion above has got something to do with the Ibrox Disaster!

Which brings me on to the poor sod that died at the Scotland vs Ireland game. I've no doubt that it was a tragic accident but some of The Peeppul are already calling for an investigation into it, hoping desperately that Celtic can somewhow be blamed. What there should be an investigation into is all the booing of Aiden McGeady and the reports of anti-Irish chanting that went on during the match. Strachan and big Ugly McQueen should be in court for stirring up racial hatred. One of McMurdo's disciples has this to say on the subject, "The booing of McGeady was a timely reminder to me that Scotland is, in fact, Scottish." What the fuck does that even mean?

Sticking with McMurdo and he's now promoting some madcap scheme for a whole-of Britain league. Of course, the 'Quintessential British Team' would be welcomed with open arms. I can just see them clamouring for this scenario in Manchester! And everybody's favourite bigot is back with his cut-and-paste thoughts for the day. This time the windbag has a long piece about sexual abuse among Irish Republicans. I don't know the details since I didn't bother to read it, which is probably true of 'wulliewonthe' as well. These clowns really are incredible. Stories are emerging about the sexual abuse and murder of children by top people in the British Establishment and all these fuckwits can do is try to deflect! So much for only being concerned about the children!

While 'wulliewonthe' has been digging about in the internet trying to find dirt on anyone Catholic or Irish, I've been doing a bit of digging of my own. I think I've already said that I decided to take up Mick's challenge and write about the 'Better Together' campaign and, by God, there is some juicy stuff hiding away in the dark corners of the internet. It's not so much that I've made discoveries but I've found discoveries that others have made, which, linked together, make for very interesting reading indeed. You'll have to wait until the book comes out to read about this, unless, of course, somebody else joins the dots before then!

"Fuck me, boays! How the hell did wae end up like this?"

"It's your fault, ya prick! Ah telt ye wae shouldnae take that boat trip wae Bill Struth!"