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Thursday, 18 February 2016
Tuesday, 16 February 2016
TURF WARS
Aw Jeez - he's at it again! Warbs is moaning about artificial pitches before traveling to Rugby Park tonight. (It's good to get the excuses in early!) The guy's been in football for five minutes and already he knows better than everybody else. If artificial pitches are so bad, then why isn't everybody complaining about them? And how is it that tennis players can function on every surface from concrete to half-set custard without moaning about injuries? Away back to the stock exchange and play with your ticker-tape or something! God help him if his team had to play on blaes (or 'rid ash' as we called it in Glasgow) like most youngsters do.
Oh, wait! He's brought hauners with him. Unfortunately, the only person he could get is Sevco player Rob Kiernan. Kiernan goes down the same road as his boss, greeting about 'health and safety'. It's no' fair, apparently, since you can't even do a sliding tackle (i.e. two-footed lunge) without getting injured. I never thought I'd see the day when an Ibrox manager or player was on about 'health and safety'. John Greig probably caused more injuries in his day than any artificial pitch could ever hope to compete with and Ibrox has always had the dubious distinction of being the only stadium in the world with a triage section in the Away changing room. 'It's a man's game,' was what we were always told whenever a Rangers tackle sent an opposition player one way and his right leg the other. It looks like the new club needs to take that on board, instead of behaving like a bunch of big jessies.
So Aberdeen failed to draw level with Celtic last night and it's all the fault of Willie Collum. And it's not just Derek McInnes that's raging; the agnivores are up in arms that their 'great white hope' has been thwarted. Isn't it strange how Collum has suddenly become incompetent after one game when he was a top referee of impeccable professionalism and unimpeachable integrity while making other 'mistakes' game after game? What happened to all the 'evens itself out over the season' stuff; does that not hold true anymore? And Hugh 'No Pope of Rome' Dallas says that Collum is one of Europe's top referees. Surely that should be good enough for our media?
Meanwhile the Record thinks it's newsworthy to let everybody know that Anthony Stokes is friendly with 'bankrupt fraudster' Barry Hughes. Shock! Horror! Er...a quick newsflash for them - there's a convicted fraudster with gangland connections in charge at Ibrox. That piece of information seems to have bypassed them; it's certainly gone under Keith Jackson's radar. Not surprisingly I've received abuse for pointing this out on the DR forum. Apparently, I'm a bigot.
Speaking of bigots, it looks like North Lanarkshire Council is not, after all, going to fly the flag to commemorate the Easter Rising. It seems that it was the SNP behind it all, trying to stir up bigotry and hatred by doing something that the...er...bigots wouldn't like. Labour has pledged to use its majority on the council to stop the flag getting anywhere near a pole. Wait a minute here - I thought that Labour was full of Fenian, terrorist-supporting, bigoted scum? That's what the denizens of Airdrie and Motherwell have been saying for years. Maybe they're all going to take the weans to the Time Capsule at long last!
Strangely, the real story isn't being touched upon here and that is that a bunch of bigots terrorised the council into doing its bidding. Regimental Blues published the names, addresses and phone numbers of all the councillors, who supported the flying of the flag, on its website, telling people, or, rather, peeppul, to use the information as they saw fit. They also stated that "every meeting you sit in, every vote you cast and every move you make within the council will be known to us. We will be watching. We have the winning hand here and we strongly suggest you do not call our bluff." Now that is as clear a threat as you're ever going to see. Worryingly, I don't see any mention anywhere of the police getting involved.
On the Evening Times forum there are quite a few folk that weren't happy about this flag flying and are calling for the Orange Walk to be banned as well. The majority of complainers, however, echo the sentiments expressed in these two posts:
"Cue the serial offended on here, this was a disgraceful attempt by a wee bigoted group of throwbacks from oirland, This is Britain, something some of the posters on here forget, if you all love this ireland that much, and going by the state the Barras/Gallowgate has become, why are you all over here, i will say it again, This is BRITAIN, like it or lump it, too much pandering in this country to minorities with a huge chip on there shoulders."
"Brit born subjects who have this love affair with all things Irish are the product of Faith Schools and continue to muddy the waters of Scottish Society.
History shows the Irish have always failed to integrate successfully into any society they have emigrated to. Chicago along with New York in the1920s and 30s had civil problems with Irish immigrants. They even ruffled Al Capone's feathers for a time."
Perhaps if these two clowns had actually gone to school they would know not only about spelling and grammar but have learned that in Britain and America Irish immigrants weren't allowed to integrate, any more than Italians or Chinese were. In fact, talks to bring Brooklyn into New York nearly hit a stumbling block as the good citizens of Brooklyn didn't want to be associated with the Irish and Italian scum of lower Manhattan!
Oh, wait! He's brought hauners with him. Unfortunately, the only person he could get is Sevco player Rob Kiernan. Kiernan goes down the same road as his boss, greeting about 'health and safety'. It's no' fair, apparently, since you can't even do a sliding tackle (i.e. two-footed lunge) without getting injured. I never thought I'd see the day when an Ibrox manager or player was on about 'health and safety'. John Greig probably caused more injuries in his day than any artificial pitch could ever hope to compete with and Ibrox has always had the dubious distinction of being the only stadium in the world with a triage section in the Away changing room. 'It's a man's game,' was what we were always told whenever a Rangers tackle sent an opposition player one way and his right leg the other. It looks like the new club needs to take that on board, instead of behaving like a bunch of big jessies.
So Aberdeen failed to draw level with Celtic last night and it's all the fault of Willie Collum. And it's not just Derek McInnes that's raging; the agnivores are up in arms that their 'great white hope' has been thwarted. Isn't it strange how Collum has suddenly become incompetent after one game when he was a top referee of impeccable professionalism and unimpeachable integrity while making other 'mistakes' game after game? What happened to all the 'evens itself out over the season' stuff; does that not hold true anymore? And Hugh 'No Pope of Rome' Dallas says that Collum is one of Europe's top referees. Surely that should be good enough for our media?
Meanwhile the Record thinks it's newsworthy to let everybody know that Anthony Stokes is friendly with 'bankrupt fraudster' Barry Hughes. Shock! Horror! Er...a quick newsflash for them - there's a convicted fraudster with gangland connections in charge at Ibrox. That piece of information seems to have bypassed them; it's certainly gone under Keith Jackson's radar. Not surprisingly I've received abuse for pointing this out on the DR forum. Apparently, I'm a bigot.
Speaking of bigots, it looks like North Lanarkshire Council is not, after all, going to fly the flag to commemorate the Easter Rising. It seems that it was the SNP behind it all, trying to stir up bigotry and hatred by doing something that the...er...bigots wouldn't like. Labour has pledged to use its majority on the council to stop the flag getting anywhere near a pole. Wait a minute here - I thought that Labour was full of Fenian, terrorist-supporting, bigoted scum? That's what the denizens of Airdrie and Motherwell have been saying for years. Maybe they're all going to take the weans to the Time Capsule at long last!
Strangely, the real story isn't being touched upon here and that is that a bunch of bigots terrorised the council into doing its bidding. Regimental Blues published the names, addresses and phone numbers of all the councillors, who supported the flying of the flag, on its website, telling people, or, rather, peeppul, to use the information as they saw fit. They also stated that "every meeting you sit in, every vote you cast and every move you make within the council will be known to us. We will be watching. We have the winning hand here and we strongly suggest you do not call our bluff." Now that is as clear a threat as you're ever going to see. Worryingly, I don't see any mention anywhere of the police getting involved.
On the Evening Times forum there are quite a few folk that weren't happy about this flag flying and are calling for the Orange Walk to be banned as well. The majority of complainers, however, echo the sentiments expressed in these two posts:
"Cue the serial offended on here, this was a disgraceful attempt by a wee bigoted group of throwbacks from oirland, This is Britain, something some of the posters on here forget, if you all love this ireland that much, and going by the state the Barras/Gallowgate has become, why are you all over here, i will say it again, This is BRITAIN, like it or lump it, too much pandering in this country to minorities with a huge chip on there shoulders."
"Brit born subjects who have this love affair with all things Irish are the product of Faith Schools and continue to muddy the waters of Scottish Society.
History shows the Irish have always failed to integrate successfully into any society they have emigrated to. Chicago along with New York in the1920s and 30s had civil problems with Irish immigrants. They even ruffled Al Capone's feathers for a time."
Perhaps if these two clowns had actually gone to school they would know not only about spelling and grammar but have learned that in Britain and America Irish immigrants weren't allowed to integrate, any more than Italians or Chinese were. In fact, talks to bring Brooklyn into New York nearly hit a stumbling block as the good citizens of Brooklyn didn't want to be associated with the Irish and Italian scum of lower Manhattan!
"Right, what smart-arse swopped my Masonic ring for a plastic one?"
Monday, 15 February 2016
FLAGGING UP BIGOTRY
Well, Alloa's cunning plan seemed to work out and Sevco were lucky to escape with a draw. I haven't seen Warbs moaning about the pitch yet; he's still trying to work out the best way to explain how his players weren't given enough room for a decent run-up for a convincing dive in the penalty box. It's just a pity that Hibs couldn't manage to take advantage. The funniest thing in the papers this weekend, though, was wee Barry Ferguson moaning about a referee. He had two of his players sent off, while Elgin had one and 'Fergie', as the Daily Record calls him (There's nothing like showing how neutral you are, eh?) is absolutely blazing. When will he get it through his head that, no matter how much he talks about Sevco in his column, his Ibrox days are gone, and along with them have gone the preferential treatment he used to rely on!
Nearly as funny, but more pathetic, is the news in the DR that Rangers (sic) and Aberdeen are going to 'join forces' with Celtic in opposing the ECA's madcap scheme to only have Europe's elite competing in the Champions League. And that's just the headline; the article is much worse. The whole piece is about how Sevco, with Aberdeen's help, is going to fight the proposal. Quite how an associate member of the ECA, with no vote and no history at all in Europe is going to do this is not explained. Almost as an afterthought, the Record says, "Celtic’s Lawwell, in his role at the ECA, is also determined to fight tooth and nail to protect Scotland’s place in the competition." It's a good job Peter Lawwell had Sevco to point out to him what he's supposed to do and I'm sure he'll support their endeavours to the best of his abilities. Aren't we lucky to have Sevco to lead Scottish football?
Not in the least bit funny, meanwhile, are the threats by Vanguard Bears over the proposal to fly an Irish flag in North Lanarkshire to commemorate the Easter Rising. They say that if the proposal is approved, then "the 24th April will see a gathering like no other to vehemently oppose this despicable action". That sounds suspiciously like a threat of violence to me. According to these Nazis, it was Cairde na hÉireann that originally asked for the flag to be flown. That, of course, is like a red rag to a bull.
The writer goes on to state how "As recently as 11th September 2015 this group had its main office in Glasgow raided and members charged under Section 13 of the Terrorism Act." That, however, does not tell the whole story. What happened was that the police, for no apparent reason, raided the office, went off with a bagful of CDs etc. and charged the old guy that works in the shop under the Terrorism Act. You can read all about it here. (You'll need to scroll down a bit.) As usual, The Peeppul rewrite things to suit themselves. In an earlier article on VB they spoke about "the George Square No Vote celebrations that were hijacked by nationalists intent on trouble". I read that with my jaw hanging to the floor at the sheer effrontery of it! As for the old guy that was arrested, nothing more has been heard so I assume the police got nowhere with their charges and the whole matter was quietly dropped.
Now, imagine that a large cache of weapons had been discovered at Cairde na hÉireann's office; The Peeppul would have cause to greet about that. Would anyone, especially The Peeppul, accept as a defence that the weapons had not been used against anybody? Not at all. The intention was there and that's good enough for condemnation and even a conviction. Please bear with me on this; there's a good reason for me going with this scenario.
The VBs say about the Easter Rising, "At a time when Britain, indeed most of Europe and their fellow countrymen were dying in the trenches halting the German jackboot, these rebellious cowards staged their rising". Halting the German jackboot? What planet is this guy on? It was all about the men of one empire fighting against those of another. It was a struggle between elites, with ordinary men doing the actual fighting. It's worth pointing out too that the majority of men fighting in the British Army did not even have the vote!
Anyway, in 1914, not long before the war started and while tensions were running high between Britain and Germany, one Edward Carson and his UVF smuggled illegal arms from Germany, with the sole purpose of fighting against the British Army. Here's where my earlier scenario is relevant. It doesn't matter whether or not the guns were used; the intention was clear. The man was a traitor. And yet, there's a fucking great statue of the cunt at Stormont. I wonder if Vanguard Bears would like this statue removed.
Taking advantage of situations has long been a facet of war and revolution. The great victory won by Washington after he crossed the River Delaware only happened because the British garrison was completely relaxed and off-guard, not expecting an attack on Christmas Day. Maybe VB would like the flying of the Stars and Stripes banned as well. Britain itself was not averse to attacking natives when they were engaged elsewhere, often stirring up trouble for the purpose, as was done with the Ndebele and Shona tribes, between whom a war was started so that the British could mop up the pieces and get all the diamonds, ore and coal reserves in what was to become Rhodesia. You can hardly blame the Irish men and women for taking advantage of the situation that presented itself in 1916.
Everyone has moved on since then; even the Queen has apologised for the brutality shown against the Irish people for centuries. All over the world the Irish diaspora will be celebrating the events of 1916, which eventually led to a free, independent Irish state. Even those with no Irish ancestry will be joining in, realising the significance of the event. There will be no problem anywhere with this; even in England there will probably be some commemoration events taking place. Not so, however, in Scotland. Vanguard Bears states that "We will defend our rights and traditions as citizens of the United Kingdom, unlike the current Scottish Government who seem hell-bent in eradicating it." As we always suspected, it seems that those 'rights and traditions' wholly consist of hatred and bigotry.
All the moaning and griping has reminded me of 1989, when there were to be celebrations throughout Europe to commemorate the French Revolution, one of the most important events in history. Margaret Thatcher was vehemently opposed to any such celebrations, stating publicly that the French Revolution was 'not that important'. This led to much ridicule in the press and even a humorous book on Thatcher's view of history. Her supporters claimed that Magna Carta was actually more important to the foundation of modern democracy than the French Revolution. No wonder The Peeppul loved Thatcher so much; she was just as deranged and detached from reality as they are!
It appears that my new blog about Serious Religious Discussion has been a non-starter. I was beginning to think that nobody was interested until I discovered the real reason for the lack of activity; no bugger is able to post comments. I've changed the settings around but it doesn't seem to have made any difference. I might as well give up, since it looks as if it will be less of a discussion and more like me pontificating about everything!
Finally, doing research for a book can have its drawbacks. For my new one, which follows on from 'Fear and Smear', I was looking on Amazon for those ridiculous translations, by a company called Itchy Coo, of Roald Dahl books into what the translators call 'Scots'. You know the kind of thing I mean; I'm sure I've moaned about it on here before. Now, however, when I'm looking at the websites of newspapers etc. I'm being stalked by adverts for this pish, as if I'm interested in a 'Scots' translation of the Gruffalo. (I didn't even like the original book!) Talk about suffering for your art!
Nearly as funny, but more pathetic, is the news in the DR that Rangers (sic) and Aberdeen are going to 'join forces' with Celtic in opposing the ECA's madcap scheme to only have Europe's elite competing in the Champions League. And that's just the headline; the article is much worse. The whole piece is about how Sevco, with Aberdeen's help, is going to fight the proposal. Quite how an associate member of the ECA, with no vote and no history at all in Europe is going to do this is not explained. Almost as an afterthought, the Record says, "Celtic’s Lawwell, in his role at the ECA, is also determined to fight tooth and nail to protect Scotland’s place in the competition." It's a good job Peter Lawwell had Sevco to point out to him what he's supposed to do and I'm sure he'll support their endeavours to the best of his abilities. Aren't we lucky to have Sevco to lead Scottish football?
Not in the least bit funny, meanwhile, are the threats by Vanguard Bears over the proposal to fly an Irish flag in North Lanarkshire to commemorate the Easter Rising. They say that if the proposal is approved, then "the 24th April will see a gathering like no other to vehemently oppose this despicable action". That sounds suspiciously like a threat of violence to me. According to these Nazis, it was Cairde na hÉireann that originally asked for the flag to be flown. That, of course, is like a red rag to a bull.
The writer goes on to state how "As recently as 11th September 2015 this group had its main office in Glasgow raided and members charged under Section 13 of the Terrorism Act." That, however, does not tell the whole story. What happened was that the police, for no apparent reason, raided the office, went off with a bagful of CDs etc. and charged the old guy that works in the shop under the Terrorism Act. You can read all about it here. (You'll need to scroll down a bit.) As usual, The Peeppul rewrite things to suit themselves. In an earlier article on VB they spoke about "the George Square No Vote celebrations that were hijacked by nationalists intent on trouble". I read that with my jaw hanging to the floor at the sheer effrontery of it! As for the old guy that was arrested, nothing more has been heard so I assume the police got nowhere with their charges and the whole matter was quietly dropped.
Now, imagine that a large cache of weapons had been discovered at Cairde na hÉireann's office; The Peeppul would have cause to greet about that. Would anyone, especially The Peeppul, accept as a defence that the weapons had not been used against anybody? Not at all. The intention was there and that's good enough for condemnation and even a conviction. Please bear with me on this; there's a good reason for me going with this scenario.
The VBs say about the Easter Rising, "At a time when Britain, indeed most of Europe and their fellow countrymen were dying in the trenches halting the German jackboot, these rebellious cowards staged their rising". Halting the German jackboot? What planet is this guy on? It was all about the men of one empire fighting against those of another. It was a struggle between elites, with ordinary men doing the actual fighting. It's worth pointing out too that the majority of men fighting in the British Army did not even have the vote!
Anyway, in 1914, not long before the war started and while tensions were running high between Britain and Germany, one Edward Carson and his UVF smuggled illegal arms from Germany, with the sole purpose of fighting against the British Army. Here's where my earlier scenario is relevant. It doesn't matter whether or not the guns were used; the intention was clear. The man was a traitor. And yet, there's a fucking great statue of the cunt at Stormont. I wonder if Vanguard Bears would like this statue removed.
Taking advantage of situations has long been a facet of war and revolution. The great victory won by Washington after he crossed the River Delaware only happened because the British garrison was completely relaxed and off-guard, not expecting an attack on Christmas Day. Maybe VB would like the flying of the Stars and Stripes banned as well. Britain itself was not averse to attacking natives when they were engaged elsewhere, often stirring up trouble for the purpose, as was done with the Ndebele and Shona tribes, between whom a war was started so that the British could mop up the pieces and get all the diamonds, ore and coal reserves in what was to become Rhodesia. You can hardly blame the Irish men and women for taking advantage of the situation that presented itself in 1916.
Everyone has moved on since then; even the Queen has apologised for the brutality shown against the Irish people for centuries. All over the world the Irish diaspora will be celebrating the events of 1916, which eventually led to a free, independent Irish state. Even those with no Irish ancestry will be joining in, realising the significance of the event. There will be no problem anywhere with this; even in England there will probably be some commemoration events taking place. Not so, however, in Scotland. Vanguard Bears states that "We will defend our rights and traditions as citizens of the United Kingdom, unlike the current Scottish Government who seem hell-bent in eradicating it." As we always suspected, it seems that those 'rights and traditions' wholly consist of hatred and bigotry.
All the moaning and griping has reminded me of 1989, when there were to be celebrations throughout Europe to commemorate the French Revolution, one of the most important events in history. Margaret Thatcher was vehemently opposed to any such celebrations, stating publicly that the French Revolution was 'not that important'. This led to much ridicule in the press and even a humorous book on Thatcher's view of history. Her supporters claimed that Magna Carta was actually more important to the foundation of modern democracy than the French Revolution. No wonder The Peeppul loved Thatcher so much; she was just as deranged and detached from reality as they are!
It appears that my new blog about Serious Religious Discussion has been a non-starter. I was beginning to think that nobody was interested until I discovered the real reason for the lack of activity; no bugger is able to post comments. I've changed the settings around but it doesn't seem to have made any difference. I might as well give up, since it looks as if it will be less of a discussion and more like me pontificating about everything!
Finally, doing research for a book can have its drawbacks. For my new one, which follows on from 'Fear and Smear', I was looking on Amazon for those ridiculous translations, by a company called Itchy Coo, of Roald Dahl books into what the translators call 'Scots'. You know the kind of thing I mean; I'm sure I've moaned about it on here before. Now, however, when I'm looking at the websites of newspapers etc. I'm being stalked by adverts for this pish, as if I'm interested in a 'Scots' translation of the Gruffalo. (I didn't even like the original book!) Talk about suffering for your art!
"Flags? We didn't have flags at Brentford. In my experience...blah...blah...blah...drone..."
Friday, 12 February 2016
THE BENEFIT OF EXPERIENCE
I was thinking of starting up another blog where I could give everybody the benefit of my experience as a grandfather. What do you mean, what would I know about it? I've been a grandfather for all of two weeks now, so I know everything there is to know! I don't care if you've been a grandparent for fifteen years or whatever; I still know better than you.
Well, it's not any more stupid than listening to the advice of a man that has been involved in football for all of five minutes, is it? And yet, we're all supposed to listen and pay heed to 'Warbs' as he tells us what's wrong with Scottish football. He's been moaning to all and sundry about Alloa reducing the size of their pitch and now he's banging on about artificial pitches. Apparently that's what's holding Scottish football back and if we only had decent grass pitches then we'd have the same TV money flooding in as they do in England. How did football survive without this genius to tell everybody what's gone wrong? I wonder what would happen if Gordon Strachan turned up at the London Stock Exchange and told them how they should be running things.
Has this clown seen the state of Hampden? That's what many grass pitches look like in Scotland and, as I've said on here before, that's a bigger disgrace than one made out of plastic. 'Artificial pitches cause injuries', bleats Warbs. And what the hell does he think happens to players that have to perform on a tattie field?
The Daily Record had an article about some drunk guy in Manchester urinating against the war memorial in St. Peter's Square. Said article has disappeared and even a search on the DR website fails to unearth it. The Daily Mirror still has the story so obviously it's just the Record that has decided to pull it. I wonder why. It couldn't have anything to do with the fact that The Peeppul pished all over this very monument in 2008, could it? It certainly wouldn't do to remind folk in Scotland of that particular incident. What would Warbs say?
Meanwhile, a big stooshie has emerged over plans by the European Clubs Association to change the Champions League into a tournament for Europe's 'top twenty' teams, no matter where they sit in their respective leagues. This was bound to happen since the whole thing is already a joke with countries like England able to send four teams, while the winner of the Europa League is now able to qualify automatically. Really, it should be the champions from each European league that take part, with an exception made for the holders. At the moment it is not a 'champions' league. Neil Doncaster says, 'If Europe's top clubs are allowed automatic access, then that could leave clubs like Celtic and Rangers (sic) on the outside looking in'. Er...I don't think he needs to worry about Sevco; I think their noses are going to be pressed against the window for a long while yet, if they stay alive that is!
The corporate services committee of North Lanarkshire Council has approved a request to fly the Irish flag over council buildings on May 24th to commemorate the Easter Rising of 1916. Holy shit, Batman! Can you imagine the furore that's going to cause? In a masterclass of understatement, the Daily Record says, 'The decision to fly the flag will still have to be approved by the full council, and it is expected there will be fierce opposition from councillors to the move.' I bet there'll be! Fortunately for all concerned, the friendly town of Larkhall is in South Lanarkshire. I'm sure, though, that their brothers from Airdrie and Harthill will be there to make sure their 'tradishuns' and 'culchur' aren't trampled on!
On the political front, is there nothing like a Hansard for the Scottish Parliament? I've looked at the website and all I can find is mere skeleton outlines of debates etc. I wanted to read the full text of Jackie Baillie's speech about organ donation. Apparently, while other parties left it as a free vote, Scottish Labour used the whip and Baillie's speech was supposedly very party political, a charge she denies. There's a guy going on about it in the Record, telling us how his wife has cystic fibrosis and how he blames the SNP for 'playing politics' with the issue. The whole thing hinges on the speech that Baillie gave; I'd like to hear or read it for myself. The article in the Record, meanwhile, waits until the very end to inform us, almost as an afterthought, that the man writing the piece is actually standing for election to Holyrood for RISE. It appears that the knives are out already.
Finally, bad news yet again for The Peeppul as King's warchest ends up in the hands of the police.
Well, it's not any more stupid than listening to the advice of a man that has been involved in football for all of five minutes, is it? And yet, we're all supposed to listen and pay heed to 'Warbs' as he tells us what's wrong with Scottish football. He's been moaning to all and sundry about Alloa reducing the size of their pitch and now he's banging on about artificial pitches. Apparently that's what's holding Scottish football back and if we only had decent grass pitches then we'd have the same TV money flooding in as they do in England. How did football survive without this genius to tell everybody what's gone wrong? I wonder what would happen if Gordon Strachan turned up at the London Stock Exchange and told them how they should be running things.
Has this clown seen the state of Hampden? That's what many grass pitches look like in Scotland and, as I've said on here before, that's a bigger disgrace than one made out of plastic. 'Artificial pitches cause injuries', bleats Warbs. And what the hell does he think happens to players that have to perform on a tattie field?
The Daily Record had an article about some drunk guy in Manchester urinating against the war memorial in St. Peter's Square. Said article has disappeared and even a search on the DR website fails to unearth it. The Daily Mirror still has the story so obviously it's just the Record that has decided to pull it. I wonder why. It couldn't have anything to do with the fact that The Peeppul pished all over this very monument in 2008, could it? It certainly wouldn't do to remind folk in Scotland of that particular incident. What would Warbs say?
Meanwhile, a big stooshie has emerged over plans by the European Clubs Association to change the Champions League into a tournament for Europe's 'top twenty' teams, no matter where they sit in their respective leagues. This was bound to happen since the whole thing is already a joke with countries like England able to send four teams, while the winner of the Europa League is now able to qualify automatically. Really, it should be the champions from each European league that take part, with an exception made for the holders. At the moment it is not a 'champions' league. Neil Doncaster says, 'If Europe's top clubs are allowed automatic access, then that could leave clubs like Celtic and Rangers (sic) on the outside looking in'. Er...I don't think he needs to worry about Sevco; I think their noses are going to be pressed against the window for a long while yet, if they stay alive that is!
The corporate services committee of North Lanarkshire Council has approved a request to fly the Irish flag over council buildings on May 24th to commemorate the Easter Rising of 1916. Holy shit, Batman! Can you imagine the furore that's going to cause? In a masterclass of understatement, the Daily Record says, 'The decision to fly the flag will still have to be approved by the full council, and it is expected there will be fierce opposition from councillors to the move.' I bet there'll be! Fortunately for all concerned, the friendly town of Larkhall is in South Lanarkshire. I'm sure, though, that their brothers from Airdrie and Harthill will be there to make sure their 'tradishuns' and 'culchur' aren't trampled on!
On the political front, is there nothing like a Hansard for the Scottish Parliament? I've looked at the website and all I can find is mere skeleton outlines of debates etc. I wanted to read the full text of Jackie Baillie's speech about organ donation. Apparently, while other parties left it as a free vote, Scottish Labour used the whip and Baillie's speech was supposedly very party political, a charge she denies. There's a guy going on about it in the Record, telling us how his wife has cystic fibrosis and how he blames the SNP for 'playing politics' with the issue. The whole thing hinges on the speech that Baillie gave; I'd like to hear or read it for myself. The article in the Record, meanwhile, waits until the very end to inform us, almost as an afterthought, that the man writing the piece is actually standing for election to Holyrood for RISE. It appears that the knives are out already.
Finally, bad news yet again for The Peeppul as King's warchest ends up in the hands of the police.
A song for Warbs.
Wednesday, 10 February 2016
NEW BLOG
I've started up a new blog for religious and philosophical debate. (Too much time on my hands!) Have a look and see if you're interested.
http://seriousreligiousdebate.blogspot.co.uk/2016/02/is-he-there-or-not.html
http://seriousreligiousdebate.blogspot.co.uk/2016/02/is-he-there-or-not.html
Tuesday, 9 February 2016
GERIATRICS, GENIUSES AND GERS
There was drama in yesterday's Scottish Cup quarter-finals draw. El Presidente, Alan McRae, almost did the unthinkable. The drill had been explained to him: the ball that's been heated a bit in the microwave has got Sevco in it. Make sure you get Celtic (the one that's been in the freezer) out the way first before drawing the Sevco ball; we can't have those bastards laughing at our team being hammered by them! As arranged, McRae got Celtic out of the way before picking the Sevco ball. Unfortunately he made a complete arse of it. He picked out the ball that had 'Dumbarton or Dundee' for the Home team and then lifted the next one. Being a bit on the old side, McRae's circulation is not all it could be, so he hadn't noticed that he'd picked up the warm ball. His blood must have frozen when he took out the slip of paper and saw his mistake. He was setting Sevco up, if they managed to defeat Kilmarnock, for an AWAY draw! He bumbled and muttered something about there "being a problem here". A quick story was made up about an open ball and the draw was redone; properly this time. Phew! Very nearly a catastrophe!
The Daily Record decided to wheel out (if you'll pardon the pun) 'financial genius' Kieran Prior once again. It's strange that an article that is reporting an interview doesn't have a single inverted comma in the whole piece. Anyway, this demon of the stock market is advising Dave King to pursue Ashley through the courts, completely ignoring the fact that Honest Dave is skint while Ashley has almost unlimited resources. If that's the kind of financial advice this guy gives, then it's no wonder that he's always dressed as if his mammy got his clothes down at the local Oxfam shop. Even his wheelchair looks as if it's seen better days. We're constantly being told how this guy is a 'former Goldman Sachs trader', which immediately begs the question as to why he's not anymore.
Apparently, the Daily Record earlier claimed that Prior had an IQ of 234, which is seemingly well beyond mere genius level. This bit of the article was later removed but, luckily, the Celtic Blog took a screenshot and we can all still have a laugh. (Thanks go to Hector for providing the link over on Bampots Utd.) It got me thinking about IQs and reminded me of the time I tried out a book, called 'Find Your Own IQ'; it was lying about my ma's house for some unknown reason. The book recommended that you do a few of the tests before marking them and then work out an average. I did five of the tests and couldn't help noticing that they got easier as I went along, since I was getting used to the style of questioning and what was expected. When I marked them, using the answers at the back, the fifth test I'd done showed an IQ way off the radar, even beyond Kieran Prior levels! This particular test, and the high score on the fourth one, made my average approach the mid-200s. Now, I can be a real arrogant bastard about my intelligence but even I could see that the whole thing was a load of shite. I've been sceptical about IQs ever since. If Keiran Prior has got one of the highest IQs ever recorded, then it completely proves my point since, as the Celtic Blog points out, he's been investing in a loss-making venture with a parade of crooks at the helm! Then again, maybe he's been the master manipulator behind everything; a sort of Sevconian Keyser Soze.
Probably the best laugh in the DR is their article asking if Nacho Novo is a 'legend'. If they wanted an affirmative answer to that, they should have asked Novo himself as he certainly thinks he deserves legendary status. Actually, Novo was an average player, who never achieved anything of note outside of Rangers, which is a telling fact. His goals were mostly achieved by employing Auld Dignity's favourite technique; one that Kenny Miller was adept at exploiting as well. An opposition player would be fouled and while everyone's attention was focused on what was an obvious free kick, Novo would sneak in with the ball and score. As to his assertion that he 'said NO', it is always forgotten that Martin O'Neill didn't actually want him. He's hardly the stuff of legend. Then again, for a support that voted an out-and-out thug like John Greig as the 'Greatest Ever Ranger', maybe Novo deserves his place in that particular pantheon!
Finally, there's recently been a plethora of videos on online editions of newspapers, showing operations and disgusting things like abscesses being lanced, pimples being squeezed etc. At least you get the choice about clicking on the video or not. I remember a few years ago these kind of things used to be shown on TV, usually on the likes of 'The One Show' when folk were having their evening meal. I wrote a poem about it at the time:
There's nothin' mair scunnerin', an' it fair leaves ye wunnerin'
Jist what they ur thinkin' aboot
When ye jist start yer tea an' then oan the TV
There's a guy wi' ays arse hingin' oot.
It's a big operation tae cure constipation,
He's no' went fur nearly a year.
The cameras ur rollin', an' there's wan in ays colon
In HD, so you'll see it clear.
Ye shun yer fish fingers when the camera lingers
Oan what it is causin' the block.
No wanny yer chips has gone near yer lips;
Ye've forgotten them due tae the shock.
The surgeons expel it, ye can near enough smell it
As a year's worth-a waste aw comes doon.
Ye've never seen worse an' ye let oot a curse
As yer stomach it burls roon' an' roon'.
Yer appetite's flown an' ye let oot a groan
Cos ye don't feel in very good nick.
Ye swear like a navvy as ye run fur the lavvy
Cos ye think that ye're gonnae bae sick.
A law should bae passed that they canny broadcast
They things till past nine o'cloak.
It's no' actin' fairly tae show programmes early
That jist end up gie'n ye the boak!
The Daily Record decided to wheel out (if you'll pardon the pun) 'financial genius' Kieran Prior once again. It's strange that an article that is reporting an interview doesn't have a single inverted comma in the whole piece. Anyway, this demon of the stock market is advising Dave King to pursue Ashley through the courts, completely ignoring the fact that Honest Dave is skint while Ashley has almost unlimited resources. If that's the kind of financial advice this guy gives, then it's no wonder that he's always dressed as if his mammy got his clothes down at the local Oxfam shop. Even his wheelchair looks as if it's seen better days. We're constantly being told how this guy is a 'former Goldman Sachs trader', which immediately begs the question as to why he's not anymore.
Apparently, the Daily Record earlier claimed that Prior had an IQ of 234, which is seemingly well beyond mere genius level. This bit of the article was later removed but, luckily, the Celtic Blog took a screenshot and we can all still have a laugh. (Thanks go to Hector for providing the link over on Bampots Utd.) It got me thinking about IQs and reminded me of the time I tried out a book, called 'Find Your Own IQ'; it was lying about my ma's house for some unknown reason. The book recommended that you do a few of the tests before marking them and then work out an average. I did five of the tests and couldn't help noticing that they got easier as I went along, since I was getting used to the style of questioning and what was expected. When I marked them, using the answers at the back, the fifth test I'd done showed an IQ way off the radar, even beyond Kieran Prior levels! This particular test, and the high score on the fourth one, made my average approach the mid-200s. Now, I can be a real arrogant bastard about my intelligence but even I could see that the whole thing was a load of shite. I've been sceptical about IQs ever since. If Keiran Prior has got one of the highest IQs ever recorded, then it completely proves my point since, as the Celtic Blog points out, he's been investing in a loss-making venture with a parade of crooks at the helm! Then again, maybe he's been the master manipulator behind everything; a sort of Sevconian Keyser Soze.
Probably the best laugh in the DR is their article asking if Nacho Novo is a 'legend'. If they wanted an affirmative answer to that, they should have asked Novo himself as he certainly thinks he deserves legendary status. Actually, Novo was an average player, who never achieved anything of note outside of Rangers, which is a telling fact. His goals were mostly achieved by employing Auld Dignity's favourite technique; one that Kenny Miller was adept at exploiting as well. An opposition player would be fouled and while everyone's attention was focused on what was an obvious free kick, Novo would sneak in with the ball and score. As to his assertion that he 'said NO', it is always forgotten that Martin O'Neill didn't actually want him. He's hardly the stuff of legend. Then again, for a support that voted an out-and-out thug like John Greig as the 'Greatest Ever Ranger', maybe Novo deserves his place in that particular pantheon!
Finally, there's recently been a plethora of videos on online editions of newspapers, showing operations and disgusting things like abscesses being lanced, pimples being squeezed etc. At least you get the choice about clicking on the video or not. I remember a few years ago these kind of things used to be shown on TV, usually on the likes of 'The One Show' when folk were having their evening meal. I wrote a poem about it at the time:
There's nothin' mair scunnerin', an' it fair leaves ye wunnerin'
Jist what they ur thinkin' aboot
When ye jist start yer tea an' then oan the TV
There's a guy wi' ays arse hingin' oot.
It's a big operation tae cure constipation,
He's no' went fur nearly a year.
The cameras ur rollin', an' there's wan in ays colon
In HD, so you'll see it clear.
Ye shun yer fish fingers when the camera lingers
Oan what it is causin' the block.
No wanny yer chips has gone near yer lips;
Ye've forgotten them due tae the shock.
The surgeons expel it, ye can near enough smell it
As a year's worth-a waste aw comes doon.
Ye've never seen worse an' ye let oot a curse
As yer stomach it burls roon' an' roon'.
Yer appetite's flown an' ye let oot a groan
Cos ye don't feel in very good nick.
Ye swear like a navvy as ye run fur the lavvy
Cos ye think that ye're gonnae bae sick.
A law should bae passed that they canny broadcast
They things till past nine o'cloak.
It's no' actin' fairly tae show programmes early
That jist end up gie'n ye the boak!
"Oh, fuck!"
Saturday, 6 February 2016
WHO'S THE MINNOWS?
Imagine if the East Kilbride v Celtic match were to end up in a 0-0 draw. The headlines, of course, would be how EK had managed to hold Celtic and how Celtic had struggled to break down a determined EK defence. Nobody would dream of reporting things the other way round, as if the minnows had struggled against the Premiership team and that Celtic had held EK to a draw. And yet a Premiership team today played against a team from the lower leagues and it's been reported as if the top-tier side was the bold minnows that managed to hold on for a draw!
"Gers (sic) can't find a breakthrough as Killie hold tight to earn a replay" says the Daily Record. WTF? Kilmarnock has 'earned' a replay against a team from a lower league! I know the DR is merely the mouthpiece for Level 5 but this is getting ridiculous. I suppose if Kilmarnock win the replay they'll be 'plucky underdogs' that got the rub of the green. That is, of course, assuming Kilmarnock does win the replay. Lee McCulloch is probably down the Ludge as we speak, having it explained to him how things are supposed to go. Stuart McCall will no doubt be on hand to give him a few pointers.
Meanwhile, the ones that couldn't afford a ticket for today's match stood outside the Ibrox Megastore, waving banners and frightening passers-by with their Halloween masks. I'm sure Mike Ashley will be tossing and turning in his bed tonight! The Daily Record says:
"Earlier this year, a section of the Newcastle home support unfurled a 'Sports Direct Shame' banner in their match against Manchester United - exposing the company to a worldwide television audience as well as the 49,600-strong St James' Park crowd."
It goes on:
I see on Twitter that some of The Peeppul are trying to justify the Herald not sticking up for its journalist and Angela Haggerty being sacked by the Sunday Herald. One of them has posted a picture of folk during the Independence Referendum, demanding that Nick Robinson be sacked by the BBC. He seems to think that both circumstances are the same. He just doesn't get it, does he? The BBC stood by Robinson and refused to give in to pressure. This kind of thing happens all the time, with folk demanding resignations or sackings. The Herald, though, was all too quick to give in to the mob. That's what the NUJ, and countless others, are annoyed at!
The next thing for The Peeppul to get riled about is the comedy session at the court case involving Ashley and the SFA. There have been some excellent one-liners from the bench that even Bob Hope would have been proud of. There's no point in me repeating them all here. You can read them over on The Clumpany's blog by clicking on the button on the right.
Finally, anybody that knows me knows that I like nothing better than a good philosophical argument. I include religion in that and love debating on theology and soteriology. I once held two Jehovah's Witnesses at my door for nearly an hour and they had to make desperate excuses about having to pick up children in order to escape! It transpires that Wulliewonthe, who used to post on McMurdo's blog, thought I never bothered to debate with him, when the reality was that Merlin didn't allow my posts. So everybody else can look away a minute as I ask a question to get a debate going. Nobody else in a Reformed faith, including a couple of ministers, have been able to answer this one. So here goes:
If Double Predestination is true and God chose, right back at the beginning of time, who would be saved and who would be condemned to everlasting torment, what was the point of Christ?
Right, WWH! I'm looking forward to an answer to that conundrum. Everybody else is quite welcome to join in, as long as you stick to the point!
It goes on:
"Rangers (sic) fans have unfurled similar banners over the last three years in anger at the Newcastle owner's involvement in the club's affairs."
No mention of the television audience there! Maybe that's because it was just Angus Og and his maw, watching on BBC Alba!
Today's demonstrators have possibly undermined their own case somewhat. I could be wrong, but some of those tops and jackets look suspiciously like Sports Direct, o-ff-i-shell merchandise!
No mention of the television audience there! Maybe that's because it was just Angus Og and his maw, watching on BBC Alba!
Today's demonstrators have possibly undermined their own case somewhat. I could be wrong, but some of those tops and jackets look suspiciously like Sports Direct, o-ff-i-shell merchandise!
I see on Twitter that some of The Peeppul are trying to justify the Herald not sticking up for its journalist and Angela Haggerty being sacked by the Sunday Herald. One of them has posted a picture of folk during the Independence Referendum, demanding that Nick Robinson be sacked by the BBC. He seems to think that both circumstances are the same. He just doesn't get it, does he? The BBC stood by Robinson and refused to give in to pressure. This kind of thing happens all the time, with folk demanding resignations or sackings. The Herald, though, was all too quick to give in to the mob. That's what the NUJ, and countless others, are annoyed at!
The next thing for The Peeppul to get riled about is the comedy session at the court case involving Ashley and the SFA. There have been some excellent one-liners from the bench that even Bob Hope would have been proud of. There's no point in me repeating them all here. You can read them over on The Clumpany's blog by clicking on the button on the right.
Finally, anybody that knows me knows that I like nothing better than a good philosophical argument. I include religion in that and love debating on theology and soteriology. I once held two Jehovah's Witnesses at my door for nearly an hour and they had to make desperate excuses about having to pick up children in order to escape! It transpires that Wulliewonthe, who used to post on McMurdo's blog, thought I never bothered to debate with him, when the reality was that Merlin didn't allow my posts. So everybody else can look away a minute as I ask a question to get a debate going. Nobody else in a Reformed faith, including a couple of ministers, have been able to answer this one. So here goes:
If Double Predestination is true and God chose, right back at the beginning of time, who would be saved and who would be condemned to everlasting torment, what was the point of Christ?
Right, WWH! I'm looking forward to an answer to that conundrum. Everybody else is quite welcome to join in, as long as you stick to the point!
A seriously worried Mike Ashley hears about today's demonstration.
Friday, 5 February 2016
NOTHING QUITE LIKE IT FOR COOLING THE BLOOD.
I tuned into the second half on Wednesday night and my first shock wasn't the score; it was the state of that pitch, if you could call it that. It looked more like the kind of terrain Hector might traverse in his plus-fours as he looks to murder innocent, unsuspecting deer! It was pretty obvious that Celtic couldn't cope with the ground, just as they couldn't cope at Hampden last week. (Do you think Hampden will be in that state when the final of the Petomane Cup is played?) It highlights a major deficiency in Celtic's training methods, as they should be looking at different ways of playing on different surfaces. There is also the old adage of 'horses for courses' and there's no point in sending out a team of silky-skilled players onto a quagmire where every pass is stopped dead in its tracks after a few feet by a hole or a divot.
When a pitch is as badly cut-up as that there is more chance of injury to players, which might well explain why Ronny Deila doesn't train on that kind of surface. But, then, why should he expect his players to train in mud just because other clubs won't make sure their pitches are playable? And we're not talking about some Junior League team here; this is Aberdeen, who should surely have enough money to keep the pitch in a decent state. It's the same with Hampden. Is the SFA honestly happy with the world laughing at what passes as a playing field in our national stadium?
And now we've got Bobby Connor, ex Aberdeen 'ace', saying in the Daily Record that "the fact Celtic aren’t running away with it is a disgrace from their point of view." The article goes on about huge budgets, spending more than anyone else, blah...blah...blah. Funnily enough, I don't remember anyone saying that about Sevco when they failed to get out of the Championship at the first time of asking. Sevco also isn't 'running away with it' this season either, despite their team being the second-dearest in Scotland. I do remember, though, that plenty of excuses were made for Sooperally's team because of the standard of the pitches they had to play on. Apparently such pitches were shameful, so how much more shameful is it for top-tier teams to have to play on the same kind of surface?
This might sound like I'm making excuses. Too bloody right I am! Is it too much to expect that pitches in the Premiership, or at our national stadium, are up to standard, instead of just being suited to the kind of 'thump it and lump it' style of play employed by Aberdeen on Wednesday? It seems that the way to beat Celtic now is to get a local farmer in to churn up the pitch with a plough just before they come visiting. Can you imagine the furore if Barcelona or the like turned up for a European tie and was expected to play on that? They'd probably refuse; and rightly so. It's time some kind of standard was set for playable surfaces and clubs should be fined if they don't provide them.
Meanwhile, Sevco has finally got round to giving notice to Sports Direct. The Daily Traynor, of course, is all over the story, trumpeting it as magnificent news, even though the contract still has another seven years to run! Honest Dave must have broken a mirror somewhere by trying to look in it. The Peeppul are treated to the usual, triumphalist guff, which is sounding more and more desperate. Honest Dave is quoted extensively, obviously missing out some important points, like the truth for starters!
When a pitch is as badly cut-up as that there is more chance of injury to players, which might well explain why Ronny Deila doesn't train on that kind of surface. But, then, why should he expect his players to train in mud just because other clubs won't make sure their pitches are playable? And we're not talking about some Junior League team here; this is Aberdeen, who should surely have enough money to keep the pitch in a decent state. It's the same with Hampden. Is the SFA honestly happy with the world laughing at what passes as a playing field in our national stadium?
And now we've got Bobby Connor, ex Aberdeen 'ace', saying in the Daily Record that "the fact Celtic aren’t running away with it is a disgrace from their point of view." The article goes on about huge budgets, spending more than anyone else, blah...blah...blah. Funnily enough, I don't remember anyone saying that about Sevco when they failed to get out of the Championship at the first time of asking. Sevco also isn't 'running away with it' this season either, despite their team being the second-dearest in Scotland. I do remember, though, that plenty of excuses were made for Sooperally's team because of the standard of the pitches they had to play on. Apparently such pitches were shameful, so how much more shameful is it for top-tier teams to have to play on the same kind of surface?
This might sound like I'm making excuses. Too bloody right I am! Is it too much to expect that pitches in the Premiership, or at our national stadium, are up to standard, instead of just being suited to the kind of 'thump it and lump it' style of play employed by Aberdeen on Wednesday? It seems that the way to beat Celtic now is to get a local farmer in to churn up the pitch with a plough just before they come visiting. Can you imagine the furore if Barcelona or the like turned up for a European tie and was expected to play on that? They'd probably refuse; and rightly so. It's time some kind of standard was set for playable surfaces and clubs should be fined if they don't provide them.
Meanwhile, Sevco has finally got round to giving notice to Sports Direct. The Daily Traynor, of course, is all over the story, trumpeting it as magnificent news, even though the contract still has another seven years to run! Honest Dave must have broken a mirror somewhere by trying to look in it. The Peeppul are treated to the usual, triumphalist guff, which is sounding more and more desperate. Honest Dave is quoted extensively, obviously missing out some important points, like the truth for starters!
"An unanticipated investment [dodgy loan] was made to pay off the Sports Direct loan and to recover all security held by Sports Direct. That has now been completed [until Big Mike points out another clause in the small print] and the club has formally given notice to end the relationship with Sports Direct while still reserving our right to proceed with challenges to the existing suite of contracts and side agreements in a court of law [Masonic judges urgently required]."
"There has been substantial investment in Auchenhowie. [Ally's been in to cut the grass.] This has resulted in the broken operation that we inherited last year now being fully-functional again. [No more trips to Pizza Hut] This entailed a complete revamp of the personnel, technology and infrastructure [We've hired a man with an iPhone and that leaky tap's been fixed] and further investment is planned [If those Chinese gangsters are still willing to lend. Tongs ya bass!]."
"There has also been necessary investment into the infrastructure and facilities at Ibrox. [Leggat's pish has finally been mopped up and there's a new lavvy roll in one of the cubicles.] The stadium and its surrounds were severely neglected by prior Boards that were intent on massive cost-cutting measures. Further significant investment is required at Ibrox and the board is presently considering a programme of work [A couple of tins of paint nicked out the shipyard.] to ensure that it is returned to its status as one of the best and most iconic stadiums in Britain. [So keep up the singing, lads!] Given the scale of what is required this will take some time to complete. [i.e. Yer weans will be in their cold, cold graves before it transpires.]"
"The club invested substantially pre-season in new player and management contracts. [Those side letters have been shown to be perfectly acceptable by a Law Lord.] This was necessary to provide a team that could play attractive football [take penalties] while competing in the Championship [against part-timers] with the aim of securing promotion to the Premiership next season. The players and management will continue to pursue these objectives for the balance of the season. [Unless we go bust.]
The Board also promised the manager he would have access to funds in the January transfer window if he felt players [Action Man's Heids] were available to bring in early and improve the overall squad in advance of next season. The manager has taken advantage of this opportunity [he got ONE player he wanted] and will also now commence the identification of players [big, hacking bastards] to further improve the squad during the close season. [Anybody lend us some players? No reasonable offer refused.]"
The Board also promised the manager he would have access to funds in the January transfer window if he felt players [Action Man's Heids] were available to bring in early and improve the overall squad in advance of next season. The manager has taken advantage of this opportunity [he got ONE player he wanted] and will also now commence the identification of players [big, hacking bastards] to further improve the squad during the close season. [Anybody lend us some players? No reasonable offer refused.]"
"Work is ongoing to merge the existing supporters groups. [McMurdo and his mob will be banned for life.] The new organisation that emerges will provide Rangers fans with a way to get even closer to the club and to increase the supporter shareholding position. [Geeze yer money!]
Overall, the club is in a substantially better position – on and off the pitch – than it has been for some time. [Which isn't saying much.] The Board continues to ensure that the club is run within the balance required to secure success on the pitch while simultaneously funding the cash shortfall that is required [with more and more dodgy loans] until we have a sustainable business model. [And then all those loan sharks will have to be paid back. That's when I'm off back to the Veldt.]
The club has not secured fair value for much of its expenditure over the last few years. [Especially when you include Sooperally's wage packet.] Under the present Board that is no longer the case. [But, for fuck's sake, don't ask to see the books!]
Aye, onwards and upwards, eh?
I haven't been writing as much on here recently since I'm currently working on a follow-up to 'Fear and Smear' ('Son of Fear and Smear - The Revenge' or something like that.) I hope to have this available before the elections for the Scottish Parliament.
My wife is cooking lamb on Sunday for dinner. My daughter's partner is a Hibby so is looking forward to Sunday's match. My daughter's going to phone across when the dinner's ready, when he's going to pause the match until he's eaten. If anybody texts him about the game he's just going to say, "Paused for lamb shank." Now, I'm all for folk being fanatical about their team, but that's taking things too far!
Overall, the club is in a substantially better position – on and off the pitch – than it has been for some time. [Which isn't saying much.] The Board continues to ensure that the club is run within the balance required to secure success on the pitch while simultaneously funding the cash shortfall that is required [with more and more dodgy loans] until we have a sustainable business model. [And then all those loan sharks will have to be paid back. That's when I'm off back to the Veldt.]
The club has not secured fair value for much of its expenditure over the last few years. [Especially when you include Sooperally's wage packet.] Under the present Board that is no longer the case. [But, for fuck's sake, don't ask to see the books!]
Aye, onwards and upwards, eh?
I haven't been writing as much on here recently since I'm currently working on a follow-up to 'Fear and Smear' ('Son of Fear and Smear - The Revenge' or something like that.) I hope to have this available before the elections for the Scottish Parliament.
My wife is cooking lamb on Sunday for dinner. My daughter's partner is a Hibby so is looking forward to Sunday's match. My daughter's going to phone across when the dinner's ready, when he's going to pause the match until he's eaten. If anybody texts him about the game he's just going to say, "Paused for lamb shank." Now, I'm all for folk being fanatical about their team, but that's taking things too far!
Warbs makes sure he's ready in the event that Sevco fails to gain promotion.
Saturday, 30 January 2016
PAPER MEN
The big story, next to me becoming a grandfather, is the carry on at the Herald. Two journalists have lost their jobs at a national newspaper because of threats from The Peeppul and their club. On the internet you can't help tripping over everyone going on about it; the NUJ and normal folk expressing outrage, The Peeppul gloating. Our mainstream media, however, doesn't seem to think it worth mentioning.
For the past two years our media have been going on (and on) about so-called 'Cybernats'. Supposedly, there's an organised and co-ordinated campaign by the SNP to silence all opposition and make sure that nothing negative is said about the party and Scottish independence. Has anyone lost their job because of this 'campaign'? Has any part of our media been forced to issue an apology or a retraction? All manner of lies and smears about the SNP has sullied our media and gone unchallenged, which means that the so-called 'Cybernats' have failed miserably. Either that or they don't actually exist; I know which one I believe.
So, while our media harps on about democracy and freedom of the press being threatened by the SNP and the 'Cybernats', they cravenly refuse to even acknowledge when the press's freedom and integrity is really compromised. I don't think this scandal is going to go away anytime soon and our media is going to be the laughing-stock of the world; they'll even be sniggering in China and North Korea.
The Daily Record is still banging on about Andy Halliday's sending off, which, apparently, is the worst miscarriage of justice since the hanging of Timothy Evans. They might have more of a case if they stopped lying about what happened. I've looked at the video of the incident and there's Halliday walking over to the home crowd and punching the air in their direction. He's not, as they all try to make out 'standing in the middle of the pitch'. They've even dragged a former 'top English referee' into it, who says that there's no way it was a bookable offence. The fact that this ex referee is renowned bigot Jeff Winter rather diminishes the impact of his judgment.
The agnivores have been banging on about how players should be allowed to celebrate and that there should be no bookings at all. Sorry, but that's a load of pish. My abiding memory of Mo Johnston, when he played for Celtic, was him scoring and then running toward The Peeppul, skidding along on his knees and making the sign of the cross. It's easy to point the finger at the Huns and say that being offended by somebody blessing himself just shows what sectarian bigots they really are. There is, however, a massive difference between a player blessing himself as he runs onto the pitch, which many players do, and what Johnston did. It was something that Danny McGrain didn't like, as he said in his autobiography.
The behaviour of the likes of Johnston and Paul Gascoigne pointed up the dangers of players taunting opposition supporters. The football authorities have clamped down on it and no team should be singled out for special treatment. Celebrating a goal means running to your own supporters in joy, not rushing to rub it into the opposition. The furore over Halliday's sending off shows two things: our press is firmly under the thumb of James Sexton Traynor and 'Warbs' has definitely caught 'Rangersitis' and thinks his team is above the law.
I see McMurdo has decided to grace us with his online presence again, which momentous occasion I discovered on James Doleman's Twitter account. He's on the website of the Rangers (sic) Supporters Loyal website, waxing lyrical about the 'good old days' before the Raynjurz Haturz, both without and within, ruined the party. He's critical of everybody at Ibrox from the Murray years onwards, saying:
"The Rangers they embody is not the one my father raised me to love fiercely...Something was lost in the SDM years. A certain dignity and honour – old school you could say – was missing. For all the glory of the David Murray era, it came at a price. That price was the good name and reputation of Rangers. The pride of being a Ranger, so ensconced in hearts and minds by men like Struth and Waddell, was traded in for a win-at-all-costs mentality more akin to corporate raider than sporting champion."
While it's true that the Murray years, as we now know, was blighted by cheating and attempting to buy success with other people's money, there were actually good points; though McMurdo would probably disagree. In fact, one point probably hurts and angers Merlin and his disciples most of all. Murray's 'win-at-all-costs mentality' included the unthinkable: he signed Catholic players. McMurdo goes on:
"Thanks to certain Rangers haters in the blogosphere, the question of Rangers being a new club is back on the agenda. The reality is that the process of changing Rangers to something different has been taking place for some time. This Rangers will be shorn of its traditional values and these will be replaced by petty, hate-filled ideologies foreign to many bluenoses of my generation and older...The end game is a new Rangers, not the Gers I grew up obsessed with and in awe of. This new Rangers will be a mutated version and this mutant Rangers is what is being engineered right now.
As a boy, the defining emotion of being a Ranger was pride. The right kind of pride, not the hubris and arrogance that crept in during the Murray era.
Today I see the defining emotion of many Rangers fans as HATE. Hatred of Scottish football, the SFA, the SPFL, other teams, of “tims” and “taigs” and all that is not Rangers. It is a narrow, parochial and suffocating worldview that breeds smallness of thinking, vision and ambition. It is not the Rangers I and many others know and recognise."
Strangely enough, it's this hubris, hatred and sense of entitlement that are the only things that most of us view as the only valid argument for the current club at Ibrox being 'stull Raynjurz'! If we were to believe McMurdo, then the 'Billy Boys' is a modern invention and all the sectarianism and bigotry associated with The Peeppul was never around when Rangers was still alive. The club's long refusal to sign Catholics never happened and the bullying tactics of club and support are a completely new phenomenon. I know The Peeppul are fond of rewriting history but this is taking things to extremes!
I think I've mentioned on here before that one of the problems facing education these days is that not all teachers are graced with a reasonable degree of intelligence; in fact, some of them are downright thick. Two prime examples appeared in the papers over the past week or so. One accidentally put the porn he was watching on his laptop onto the interactive whiteboard for all his pupils to view, while the other decided to broadcast her support for the IRA on her Facebook page. How the hell these morons managed to get themselves accepted into the teaching profession in the first place is beyond me!
Our education system is run and overseen by a bunch of middle-class idealists, who believe they know what's best for saving all the working-class scum from themselves. A hundred years ago they would all be members of some eugenics society, but nowadays they believe they can teach these inferior beings to be more like them. In primary schools especially, the big push is on for healthy minds in healthy bodies. You're not allowed to give children a bar of chocolate for a prize anymore and teachers are constantly reminded that they are 'role models'. If you've read my book, 'The Crimes of Miss Jane Goldie', you'll be aware that you can be sacked for being seen letting your hair down while on holiday and God help you if anybody sees you smoking! Before I left teaching there were even calls from some quarters for teachers to be practically forced into eating healthily and taking exercise. (No, that's not what forced me out!) There were even murmurings that fat people shouldn't be employed as teachers.
Into this environment stepped out two new celebrities. Most teachers avoid social media like the plague, since you can be castigated, or even sacked and removed from the teaching register for the least thing. And there's no point in claiming that what you do outside work has no relevance to your teaching career; your contract and GTC registration clearly state that you've to avoid bringing the profession into disrepute. The young woman that put all the stuff about 'Provos' and the rest on Facebook might try to argue that her political views should have no relevance but she's missing the point. Many folk are, or claim to be, offended by these views and she should have known better. It makes no difference whether you agree with her views or not; she's a fucking idiot and deserves all she gets. After all, wouldn't she complain if another teacher posted stuff supporting NI Loyalists and the Orange Order?
The other clown's idiocy practically goes without saying. There's a phrase used on the internet, NSFW, which, surely, as an IT expert, this guy should have known. Who the hell sits looking at porn while in charge of a bunch of thirteen-year-olds? At the very least he's guilty of not doing his job properly.
What the story of these two cretins says to me is that it's time our education authorities stopped worrying about employing fit and healthy teachers and started concentrating on what's going on inside their heads. For years there have been calls for prospective teachers to sit numeracy and literacy tests; calls which teaching unions have resisted furiously. Considering the amount of teachers I've encountered that struggled with twenty-four-hour clocks, times tables, mental arithmetic, spelling and basic grammar, I believe it's long past time these tests were introduced. At the same time, they should also perhaps consider bringing in tests in basic common sense!
Finally, thanks to everybody for all the good wishes after the arrival of my granddaughter, Thea. She's back home now with her mum and dad and settling in well. I'm looking forward to watching her grow up and getting involved as much as I can. (Though, not too much. Bringing her up is her parents' job!) Rather unfortunately, her dad's a Hibby but one should always look on the bright side; at least she won't be brought up to be one of The Peeppul!
For the past two years our media have been going on (and on) about so-called 'Cybernats'. Supposedly, there's an organised and co-ordinated campaign by the SNP to silence all opposition and make sure that nothing negative is said about the party and Scottish independence. Has anyone lost their job because of this 'campaign'? Has any part of our media been forced to issue an apology or a retraction? All manner of lies and smears about the SNP has sullied our media and gone unchallenged, which means that the so-called 'Cybernats' have failed miserably. Either that or they don't actually exist; I know which one I believe.
So, while our media harps on about democracy and freedom of the press being threatened by the SNP and the 'Cybernats', they cravenly refuse to even acknowledge when the press's freedom and integrity is really compromised. I don't think this scandal is going to go away anytime soon and our media is going to be the laughing-stock of the world; they'll even be sniggering in China and North Korea.
The Daily Record is still banging on about Andy Halliday's sending off, which, apparently, is the worst miscarriage of justice since the hanging of Timothy Evans. They might have more of a case if they stopped lying about what happened. I've looked at the video of the incident and there's Halliday walking over to the home crowd and punching the air in their direction. He's not, as they all try to make out 'standing in the middle of the pitch'. They've even dragged a former 'top English referee' into it, who says that there's no way it was a bookable offence. The fact that this ex referee is renowned bigot Jeff Winter rather diminishes the impact of his judgment.
The agnivores have been banging on about how players should be allowed to celebrate and that there should be no bookings at all. Sorry, but that's a load of pish. My abiding memory of Mo Johnston, when he played for Celtic, was him scoring and then running toward The Peeppul, skidding along on his knees and making the sign of the cross. It's easy to point the finger at the Huns and say that being offended by somebody blessing himself just shows what sectarian bigots they really are. There is, however, a massive difference between a player blessing himself as he runs onto the pitch, which many players do, and what Johnston did. It was something that Danny McGrain didn't like, as he said in his autobiography.
The behaviour of the likes of Johnston and Paul Gascoigne pointed up the dangers of players taunting opposition supporters. The football authorities have clamped down on it and no team should be singled out for special treatment. Celebrating a goal means running to your own supporters in joy, not rushing to rub it into the opposition. The furore over Halliday's sending off shows two things: our press is firmly under the thumb of James Sexton Traynor and 'Warbs' has definitely caught 'Rangersitis' and thinks his team is above the law.
I see McMurdo has decided to grace us with his online presence again, which momentous occasion I discovered on James Doleman's Twitter account. He's on the website of the Rangers (sic) Supporters Loyal website, waxing lyrical about the 'good old days' before the Raynjurz Haturz, both without and within, ruined the party. He's critical of everybody at Ibrox from the Murray years onwards, saying:
"The Rangers they embody is not the one my father raised me to love fiercely...Something was lost in the SDM years. A certain dignity and honour – old school you could say – was missing. For all the glory of the David Murray era, it came at a price. That price was the good name and reputation of Rangers. The pride of being a Ranger, so ensconced in hearts and minds by men like Struth and Waddell, was traded in for a win-at-all-costs mentality more akin to corporate raider than sporting champion."
While it's true that the Murray years, as we now know, was blighted by cheating and attempting to buy success with other people's money, there were actually good points; though McMurdo would probably disagree. In fact, one point probably hurts and angers Merlin and his disciples most of all. Murray's 'win-at-all-costs mentality' included the unthinkable: he signed Catholic players. McMurdo goes on:
"Thanks to certain Rangers haters in the blogosphere, the question of Rangers being a new club is back on the agenda. The reality is that the process of changing Rangers to something different has been taking place for some time. This Rangers will be shorn of its traditional values and these will be replaced by petty, hate-filled ideologies foreign to many bluenoses of my generation and older...The end game is a new Rangers, not the Gers I grew up obsessed with and in awe of. This new Rangers will be a mutated version and this mutant Rangers is what is being engineered right now.
As a boy, the defining emotion of being a Ranger was pride. The right kind of pride, not the hubris and arrogance that crept in during the Murray era.
Today I see the defining emotion of many Rangers fans as HATE. Hatred of Scottish football, the SFA, the SPFL, other teams, of “tims” and “taigs” and all that is not Rangers. It is a narrow, parochial and suffocating worldview that breeds smallness of thinking, vision and ambition. It is not the Rangers I and many others know and recognise."
Strangely enough, it's this hubris, hatred and sense of entitlement that are the only things that most of us view as the only valid argument for the current club at Ibrox being 'stull Raynjurz'! If we were to believe McMurdo, then the 'Billy Boys' is a modern invention and all the sectarianism and bigotry associated with The Peeppul was never around when Rangers was still alive. The club's long refusal to sign Catholics never happened and the bullying tactics of club and support are a completely new phenomenon. I know The Peeppul are fond of rewriting history but this is taking things to extremes!
I think I've mentioned on here before that one of the problems facing education these days is that not all teachers are graced with a reasonable degree of intelligence; in fact, some of them are downright thick. Two prime examples appeared in the papers over the past week or so. One accidentally put the porn he was watching on his laptop onto the interactive whiteboard for all his pupils to view, while the other decided to broadcast her support for the IRA on her Facebook page. How the hell these morons managed to get themselves accepted into the teaching profession in the first place is beyond me!
Our education system is run and overseen by a bunch of middle-class idealists, who believe they know what's best for saving all the working-class scum from themselves. A hundred years ago they would all be members of some eugenics society, but nowadays they believe they can teach these inferior beings to be more like them. In primary schools especially, the big push is on for healthy minds in healthy bodies. You're not allowed to give children a bar of chocolate for a prize anymore and teachers are constantly reminded that they are 'role models'. If you've read my book, 'The Crimes of Miss Jane Goldie', you'll be aware that you can be sacked for being seen letting your hair down while on holiday and God help you if anybody sees you smoking! Before I left teaching there were even calls from some quarters for teachers to be practically forced into eating healthily and taking exercise. (No, that's not what forced me out!) There were even murmurings that fat people shouldn't be employed as teachers.
Into this environment stepped out two new celebrities. Most teachers avoid social media like the plague, since you can be castigated, or even sacked and removed from the teaching register for the least thing. And there's no point in claiming that what you do outside work has no relevance to your teaching career; your contract and GTC registration clearly state that you've to avoid bringing the profession into disrepute. The young woman that put all the stuff about 'Provos' and the rest on Facebook might try to argue that her political views should have no relevance but she's missing the point. Many folk are, or claim to be, offended by these views and she should have known better. It makes no difference whether you agree with her views or not; she's a fucking idiot and deserves all she gets. After all, wouldn't she complain if another teacher posted stuff supporting NI Loyalists and the Orange Order?
The other clown's idiocy practically goes without saying. There's a phrase used on the internet, NSFW, which, surely, as an IT expert, this guy should have known. Who the hell sits looking at porn while in charge of a bunch of thirteen-year-olds? At the very least he's guilty of not doing his job properly.
What the story of these two cretins says to me is that it's time our education authorities stopped worrying about employing fit and healthy teachers and started concentrating on what's going on inside their heads. For years there have been calls for prospective teachers to sit numeracy and literacy tests; calls which teaching unions have resisted furiously. Considering the amount of teachers I've encountered that struggled with twenty-four-hour clocks, times tables, mental arithmetic, spelling and basic grammar, I believe it's long past time these tests were introduced. At the same time, they should also perhaps consider bringing in tests in basic common sense!
Finally, thanks to everybody for all the good wishes after the arrival of my granddaughter, Thea. She's back home now with her mum and dad and settling in well. I'm looking forward to watching her grow up and getting involved as much as I can. (Though, not too much. Bringing her up is her parents' job!) Rather unfortunately, her dad's a Hibby but one should always look on the bright side; at least she won't be brought up to be one of The Peeppul!
Tuesday, 26 January 2016
THE FORGOTTEN THUGS
Living near Edinburgh, and once living in Edinburgh, there were times when it was best to avoid a lot of the pubs, especially in the New Town. Rose Street especially would be full of football fans causing absolute mayhem. Bottles would be thrown, people would be jostled about, tripped up or have beer thrown over them. The pubs were filled to bursting and the excess customers spilled out onto the street, bringing their pints with them and often throwing the empty glasses wherever they liked. Inside the pub wasn't much better, with glasses being chucked about, men vomiting where they stood and other customers would be hassled relentlessly, especially young women, who were quite frequently sexually molested. The bar staff weren't interested and if you dared complain, then you were the one that was the troublemaker. The police were nowhere to be seen, even though, as the evening progressed, fights would break out. These fans, you see, weren't your common-or-garden football fans; these were rugby football fans!
It's a thing that everybody pretends doesn't happen. They all go to Murrayfield peaceably enough, though you get the odd bit of hooliganism from them on the way in and on the way out. It's in and around the pubs that the 'hijinks' start. Some of the things I've seen and heard about are shocking; homeless people being beaten up and pissed on, restaurants being trashed and the odd gang rape. It's all just 'letting off steam' and 'boys being boys', though; even a normally staunch feminist told me that when a woman in Leith was raped by ten of these 'boys' that it must have been her own fault, she was a willing participant and then cried 'rape' afterwards. As I say, the police are never around and, essentially, these gangs of thugs are allowed to do whatever they like.
There's no denying that there's a hooligan and thuggish element attached to association football but there's always an army of policemen around to make sure no real trouble kicks off. If it does, the crushers are ready to get stuck in with the various weapons they carry as a matter of course. Make no mistake, this is a class thing. Those rugger buggers that cause all the bother in Edinburgh probably have nothing to worry about even in the unlikely event that they were to be arrested. There's every chance when they go to court that Daddy will be sitting on the bench, or maybe the judge was nominated for the New Club or the local golf club by the accused's father. These rugby hooligans are the ones that will probably be running the country in a few years' time, so everybody treads warily. Your average football supporter, however, is normally working-class, no matter how good a job he has, so he'll find that the book is thrown at him.
Yes, you get scandalous decisions, like the guy that attacked Neil Lennon being acquitted or the lenient sentences handed down to the ones that tried to kill Lennon with home-made bombs. As I've said before on here, this is to keep The Peeppul onside, making them think that they are actually a part of the Establishment, instead of being used by it. When push comes to shove, a working-class Hun will be far more likely to be banged up in the chokey than some toffee-nosed, rugby-supporting, ex public schoolboy, no matter what his religion might be. This is class war, pure and simple, and another reason to fight for independence so that we can elect the people that we want to govern us.
And now we're hearing noises about this 'face-recognition' technology. Somehow I doubt it will happen as there are already plenty of ways to identify troublemakers, which, scandalously, aren't used, especially when The Peeppul are involved. Even raising the prospect of using this technology, though, shows that the assumption is that football supporters are guilty until proven innocent. Besides, no matter how foolproof this technology is meant to be, we all know that it'll break down if it's ever employed at Ibrox!
Meanwhile, some of our agnivores aren't overly happy about Celtic lending Anthony Stokes to Hibs. I mean...how dare they! If Hibs actually win the league we'll never hear the end of it. It's as if they consider this to be cheating, somehow, denying Sevco an easy run. Strangely, though, nobody's cheating Hibs and Falkirk when 'Warbs' is getting loans from Spurs etc There's less than a week left of the transfer window; isn't there anybody we can loan out to Falkirk as well?
Keith Jackson was in the DR yesterday, gently trying to cajole Honest Dave into coming up with the readies to sign O'Halloran. He uses a quote from Oscar Wilde in some vain attempt to convince us that he's got a brain of his own but, really, we get the same, old Jabba spin. Apparently, Leeds 'swooped in' to 'steal' Diagouraga from under Warbs's nose. In reality, Sevco got nowhere near signing Diagouraga and Leeds was the only club to approach Brentford with a genuine offer. Jabba, sorry, I mean Jackson, doesn't want to have to back-pedal on his nonsensical 'exclusive' in claiming that Sevco had got their man; much easier to make up a story about Sevco being 'gazumped'. There's also the embarrassment of the claim that both Diagouraga and O'Halloran were on their way.
There's a bit of chiding for King as Jackson reminds us of how Honest Dave promised a £30m warchest and banged on about 'front-loading' most of this to ensure that Sevco won the Championship this season. Just in case Level 5 accuse him of not being with the plan, however, Jackson also tells us how King has turned everything round at Ibrox, faced down Ashley and ploughed £7m of his own money into Sevco. Er...wait, back up a minute there. King's put £7m into Sevco? How come we haven't heard that one before? Of course, this is all to do with Jackson's previous claims on King's behalf. Remember the shite about how signing these two players would 'prove' that King and Co. really had gazillions to plough into the club? He's obviously realised, or, rather, Level 5 has realised, as I did, that not signing these players all but proves that King and his cronies are skint. Hence the story about Honest Dave already having thrown a fortune of his own cash into Sevco. Jackson and his puppet masters are so easy to read. Perhaps that's what King meant when he promised to bring transparency to Sevco!
Meanwhile, Rangers (sic) blogger, Jonathan McFarlane, goes down exactly the same route, throwing in a few, Jabba-esque insults at the non-believers for good measure. This sounds as if it came straight from Traynor's poison pen:
It's a thing that everybody pretends doesn't happen. They all go to Murrayfield peaceably enough, though you get the odd bit of hooliganism from them on the way in and on the way out. It's in and around the pubs that the 'hijinks' start. Some of the things I've seen and heard about are shocking; homeless people being beaten up and pissed on, restaurants being trashed and the odd gang rape. It's all just 'letting off steam' and 'boys being boys', though; even a normally staunch feminist told me that when a woman in Leith was raped by ten of these 'boys' that it must have been her own fault, she was a willing participant and then cried 'rape' afterwards. As I say, the police are never around and, essentially, these gangs of thugs are allowed to do whatever they like.
There's no denying that there's a hooligan and thuggish element attached to association football but there's always an army of policemen around to make sure no real trouble kicks off. If it does, the crushers are ready to get stuck in with the various weapons they carry as a matter of course. Make no mistake, this is a class thing. Those rugger buggers that cause all the bother in Edinburgh probably have nothing to worry about even in the unlikely event that they were to be arrested. There's every chance when they go to court that Daddy will be sitting on the bench, or maybe the judge was nominated for the New Club or the local golf club by the accused's father. These rugby hooligans are the ones that will probably be running the country in a few years' time, so everybody treads warily. Your average football supporter, however, is normally working-class, no matter how good a job he has, so he'll find that the book is thrown at him.
Yes, you get scandalous decisions, like the guy that attacked Neil Lennon being acquitted or the lenient sentences handed down to the ones that tried to kill Lennon with home-made bombs. As I've said before on here, this is to keep The Peeppul onside, making them think that they are actually a part of the Establishment, instead of being used by it. When push comes to shove, a working-class Hun will be far more likely to be banged up in the chokey than some toffee-nosed, rugby-supporting, ex public schoolboy, no matter what his religion might be. This is class war, pure and simple, and another reason to fight for independence so that we can elect the people that we want to govern us.
And now we're hearing noises about this 'face-recognition' technology. Somehow I doubt it will happen as there are already plenty of ways to identify troublemakers, which, scandalously, aren't used, especially when The Peeppul are involved. Even raising the prospect of using this technology, though, shows that the assumption is that football supporters are guilty until proven innocent. Besides, no matter how foolproof this technology is meant to be, we all know that it'll break down if it's ever employed at Ibrox!
Meanwhile, some of our agnivores aren't overly happy about Celtic lending Anthony Stokes to Hibs. I mean...how dare they! If Hibs actually win the league we'll never hear the end of it. It's as if they consider this to be cheating, somehow, denying Sevco an easy run. Strangely, though, nobody's cheating Hibs and Falkirk when 'Warbs' is getting loans from Spurs etc There's less than a week left of the transfer window; isn't there anybody we can loan out to Falkirk as well?
Keith Jackson was in the DR yesterday, gently trying to cajole Honest Dave into coming up with the readies to sign O'Halloran. He uses a quote from Oscar Wilde in some vain attempt to convince us that he's got a brain of his own but, really, we get the same, old Jabba spin. Apparently, Leeds 'swooped in' to 'steal' Diagouraga from under Warbs's nose. In reality, Sevco got nowhere near signing Diagouraga and Leeds was the only club to approach Brentford with a genuine offer. Jabba, sorry, I mean Jackson, doesn't want to have to back-pedal on his nonsensical 'exclusive' in claiming that Sevco had got their man; much easier to make up a story about Sevco being 'gazumped'. There's also the embarrassment of the claim that both Diagouraga and O'Halloran were on their way.
There's a bit of chiding for King as Jackson reminds us of how Honest Dave promised a £30m warchest and banged on about 'front-loading' most of this to ensure that Sevco won the Championship this season. Just in case Level 5 accuse him of not being with the plan, however, Jackson also tells us how King has turned everything round at Ibrox, faced down Ashley and ploughed £7m of his own money into Sevco. Er...wait, back up a minute there. King's put £7m into Sevco? How come we haven't heard that one before? Of course, this is all to do with Jackson's previous claims on King's behalf. Remember the shite about how signing these two players would 'prove' that King and Co. really had gazillions to plough into the club? He's obviously realised, or, rather, Level 5 has realised, as I did, that not signing these players all but proves that King and his cronies are skint. Hence the story about Honest Dave already having thrown a fortune of his own cash into Sevco. Jackson and his puppet masters are so easy to read. Perhaps that's what King meant when he promised to bring transparency to Sevco!
Meanwhile, Rangers (sic) blogger, Jonathan McFarlane, goes down exactly the same route, throwing in a few, Jabba-esque insults at the non-believers for good measure. This sounds as if it came straight from Traynor's poison pen:
"Propelled forward by a climate of suspicion that has been shaped by the demented ramblings of a few discredited basement dwellers, the general atmosphere in Scotland towards King has created a PR landscape that is proving to be incredibly difficult to navigate."
Doesn't this clown actually read the paper he supposedly writes for? There's barely a word said against King in the Record; in fact, there's barely a word said against him in any of our media, which all follow the Level 5 spin. It's only us 'basement dwellers' that find it difficult to believe that The Peeppul and their cheerleaders in the media trust completely a convicted criminal. As for us 'lionising' Ashley, I'd hardly call cheering from the sidelines, as he takes on King in an ongoing, internecine war, lionising the man. Perhaps Mr. Traynor...er...Mr. McFarlane should try to remember that it wasn't that long ago that The Peeppul were 'lionising' Ashley and telling us all how they could 'smell the fear' when the five duds arrived from NUFC!
The best bit from the 'Rangers (sic) blogger', however, is this:
Doesn't this clown actually read the paper he supposedly writes for? There's barely a word said against King in the Record; in fact, there's barely a word said against him in any of our media, which all follow the Level 5 spin. It's only us 'basement dwellers' that find it difficult to believe that The Peeppul and their cheerleaders in the media trust completely a convicted criminal. As for us 'lionising' Ashley, I'd hardly call cheering from the sidelines, as he takes on King in an ongoing, internecine war, lionising the man. Perhaps Mr. Traynor...er...Mr. McFarlane should try to remember that it wasn't that long ago that The Peeppul were 'lionising' Ashley and telling us all how they could 'smell the fear' when the five duds arrived from NUFC!
The best bit from the 'Rangers (sic) blogger', however, is this:
"You simply cannot however say that these players should have been signed whatever the cost simply because the manager wants them. That’s the mentality that got us in trouble in previous eras.
Spending what we can afford, and buying players for prices that suit the club, adding value, is what it’s all about. It’s incredible to hear people who were happy to criticise the profligacy of previous regimes and then throw grenades at this one for living within its means."
Living within its means? The club's running at a loss and yet has the second-highest wage bill in Scottish football. It's limping from month to month on loans and, if it hadn't already been removed, it would be booted off the Stock Exchange for trading while insolvent. That's the thing about this desperate Level 5 stuff; for spin to be effective it should at least be believable. Then again, it's aimed at The Peeppul...
I haven't received any kind of reply from the DR web editor but I did notice that there was a toning-down of the posts in the comments section; for a day. There hasn't been so much of the child abuse stuff but some of the posts are absolutely disgusting nonetheless. I threatened to contact the police in my e-mail but I imagine that would be a waste of time. Instead, I'm building up a small collection of some of the worst posts to send to my MSP, Colin Beattie. I'll be contacting him by the end of this week so I'll let you know how I get on.
Spending what we can afford, and buying players for prices that suit the club, adding value, is what it’s all about. It’s incredible to hear people who were happy to criticise the profligacy of previous regimes and then throw grenades at this one for living within its means."
Living within its means? The club's running at a loss and yet has the second-highest wage bill in Scottish football. It's limping from month to month on loans and, if it hadn't already been removed, it would be booted off the Stock Exchange for trading while insolvent. That's the thing about this desperate Level 5 stuff; for spin to be effective it should at least be believable. Then again, it's aimed at The Peeppul...
I haven't received any kind of reply from the DR web editor but I did notice that there was a toning-down of the posts in the comments section; for a day. There hasn't been so much of the child abuse stuff but some of the posts are absolutely disgusting nonetheless. I threatened to contact the police in my e-mail but I imagine that would be a waste of time. Instead, I'm building up a small collection of some of the worst posts to send to my MSP, Colin Beattie. I'll be contacting him by the end of this week so I'll let you know how I get on.
Sevco accounts, as accepted by Sheriff Ian Miller.
Friday, 22 January 2016
THE NEW CLUB AND THE...ER...NEW CLUB.
Whenever I'm reading anything to do with Sevco online I always bookmark certain things that I think will be useful when I'm writing the next volume of the saga. Such an article appeared in the DR (where else) on the 18th January, penned by everyone's favourite Leveller, Keith Jackson. Twitter was all over this article, since Keef was claiming that Scottish football had gone to Hell in a handcart since 'Rangers' were...ahem...'relegated'. It wasn't this guff that interested me, though. The reason I bookmarked it was this bit:
"This week the Ibrox club expect to complete the captures of Toumani Diagouraga and Michael O'Halloran, two signings who are likely to cost the guts of £1m in transfer fees.
Again, this seems to provide solid proof Dave King and his board are not just cleansing their club but also have the wherewithal to properly fund Mark Warburton’s rebuild."
Now, that's the kind of bold statement that's guaranteed to come back and bite you on the arse. At the time I wondered if Jackson was aware that there's an obvious corollary to his triumphalist assertion; if Sevco didn't manage to get these two players then that would seem to 'provide solid proof' that Honest Dave and his board are fucking skint! Of course, today Diagouraga signed for Leeds Utd, Brentford ignoring the derisory offer put in by Sevco, which was, apparently, £100k.
The DR says that Sevco 'missed out' on signing Diagouraga, which gives the impression that they were pipped at the post. Jackson put a message on Twitter this afternoon saying that Sevco had weighed in with a bid of £500k. I didn't see any news of this bid anywhere else so I'm assuming it's more Level 5 shite to keep The Peeppul happy. If the bid was put in then, again, it was just to keep The Peeppul happy since there was no way they were going to be able to outbid Leeds. It's a bit like me going along to an art auction and bidding £20m for a Van Gough, knowing full well that I'll be outbid by some billionaire. Does that prove that I've got £20m? Does it hell. All it shows is that I'm a chancer and a liar, which is precisely what Sevco's late bid shows about Honest Dave.
Now all that's left is O'Halloran and already The Peeppul are playing the old sour-grapes card, claiming that he's not that good and they didn't want him anyway. (Of course, that would change dramatically if King were to actually stump up the readies!) There's been no more movement on that front and St. Johnstone seem determined to get the player's full value, rather than the £100k, a dozen bottles from King's wine cellar, a mint-condition 1970s 'Footballers' card featuring Derek Johnstone and a 1970s tin of Creamola Foam that's already been offered. It's already looking as if we've been right all along about Honest Dave's indigence and poor 'Warbs' is just going to have to make do with Action Man's Heids!
The judgement against Ashley and Sports Direct got me thinking about the different court judgments made recently and how they're going to affect business law in this country. I wasn't sure if precedent played as large a part in our justice system as it does in America but, apparently it does. There's a thing called Stare decisis, which means that when a court is reaching a decision it has to take account, and be consistent with, any decision already reached in an equal or higher court. The highest court in Scotland is the Court of Session, which august body decided last year that Dave King was 'fit and proper' to join the board of Sevco. This means that a precedent has been set allowing all manner of charlatans to fleece creditors by winding up a company and then immediately setting up a phoenix company with practically the same name. Essentially, our courts are helping to legalise fraud. It also means that Mike Ashley's case against the SFA will be a complete non-starter as the Court of Session very rarely overturns decisions made by its judges.
Then there was the hearing to decide if Wi-Fi company, 802 Works Ltd, could continue to have £300,000 of Sevco's money ring-fenced in case of insolvency. After perusing Sevco's books, the sheriff decided that the ring-fencing was unwarranted. This decision was wholly based on Sevco's accounts, the sheriff saying that they "did change the whole focus of the hearing". Fair enough, you might think, if the accounts showed a company in reasonable financial health. These accounts, however, were unaudited, which means they aren't worth the paper they're printed on. Again, a precedent has been set that means that any crooked businessman can present a set of Cordon Bleu books to a Sheriff Court and the sheriff will have to provide a very good reason for not accepting them.
Time to get the tin-foil hat on again. Remember the other day I reported how Lord Menzies, who made Chateau Charlie stump up a £50k bond, is a member of the prestigious and exclusive New Club in Edinburgh? Well, Lord Woolman, who passed Honest Dave as 'fit and proper' also happens to be a member of the Princes Street club. The New Club's membership is a closely-guarded secret and the information in 'Who's Who' about these judges being members probably came from the men themselves. One member that the club boasts about is Sean Connery. (Don't get me started on him!) One wonders who proposed Mr. Connery for membership? Which leading Edinburgh businessman was Connery known for being close to?
The New Club is a by-word for class snobbery and it is well known that its members generally come from Edinburgh's fee-paying schools. There have always been dark rumours surrounding the clique around this club and it is believed that many closed-doors deals are reached within its confines. It's certainly suspicious that top members of our judiciary meet in this clandestine club along with businessmen and politicians. And, as the majority of our top judges come from and live in Edinburgh, you can be sure that they all troop along to take luncheon at 84-87 Princes Street. You can read more about our top judges here. Be warned; you'll get angry!
If you follow me on Twitter you'll be aware that I've e-mailed the web editor of the DR to complain about the constant references to child abuse by The Peeppul on the paper's comments sections. I've threatened to contact the police if they don't do something about it. I might well just be pissing in the wind but a stand has to be taken. If you try to post anything about Old Rangers being cheats or how many of their titles are tainted your comment immediately goes into 'moderation' and then disappears without ever seeing the light of day. Meanwhile all manner of filth is allowed through and is left visible even when you report it. It'll be interesting to see if they get back to me.
And another story in the Daily Record about how Celtic is dominating Scottish football due to having more money than everyone else. Derek McInnes is quoted as saying, "Celtic brought in a player during the week which shows, again, the gulf between them and the rest. The fee and the boy’s wages would equate to my full footballing budget." So there you have it; money equals success and the team that can splash out on players is going to crush all opposition. This crops up all the time in our media. Strangely, though, Rangers gained no advantage whatsoever when they were bringing in top players using tax-payers money and using hidden contracts to cheat everybody!
Finally, I see some of The Peeppul are foaming at the mouth because the DR has a story about Gerry Adams's new book. To be honest, the book looks a load of shite, bringing together all Adams's idiosyncratic ramblings on Twitter. Obviously that's not what's got The Peeppul up in arms. One banger claims that this story's result will be that "Mirror group will destroy this once proud publication!!!" Er...who's that shaking hands with Adams in one of the pictures, the guy with the big ears? Maybe they want Prince Charles destroyed as well!
Not to be outdone, Gregory Campbell also has a book out, reflecting his thoughts, political concerns and leisure activities. It's a complete look into what his whole life is about.
Again, this seems to provide solid proof Dave King and his board are not just cleansing their club but also have the wherewithal to properly fund Mark Warburton’s rebuild."
Now, that's the kind of bold statement that's guaranteed to come back and bite you on the arse. At the time I wondered if Jackson was aware that there's an obvious corollary to his triumphalist assertion; if Sevco didn't manage to get these two players then that would seem to 'provide solid proof' that Honest Dave and his board are fucking skint! Of course, today Diagouraga signed for Leeds Utd, Brentford ignoring the derisory offer put in by Sevco, which was, apparently, £100k.
The DR says that Sevco 'missed out' on signing Diagouraga, which gives the impression that they were pipped at the post. Jackson put a message on Twitter this afternoon saying that Sevco had weighed in with a bid of £500k. I didn't see any news of this bid anywhere else so I'm assuming it's more Level 5 shite to keep The Peeppul happy. If the bid was put in then, again, it was just to keep The Peeppul happy since there was no way they were going to be able to outbid Leeds. It's a bit like me going along to an art auction and bidding £20m for a Van Gough, knowing full well that I'll be outbid by some billionaire. Does that prove that I've got £20m? Does it hell. All it shows is that I'm a chancer and a liar, which is precisely what Sevco's late bid shows about Honest Dave.
Now all that's left is O'Halloran and already The Peeppul are playing the old sour-grapes card, claiming that he's not that good and they didn't want him anyway. (Of course, that would change dramatically if King were to actually stump up the readies!) There's been no more movement on that front and St. Johnstone seem determined to get the player's full value, rather than the £100k, a dozen bottles from King's wine cellar, a mint-condition 1970s 'Footballers' card featuring Derek Johnstone and a 1970s tin of Creamola Foam that's already been offered. It's already looking as if we've been right all along about Honest Dave's indigence and poor 'Warbs' is just going to have to make do with Action Man's Heids!
The judgement against Ashley and Sports Direct got me thinking about the different court judgments made recently and how they're going to affect business law in this country. I wasn't sure if precedent played as large a part in our justice system as it does in America but, apparently it does. There's a thing called Stare decisis, which means that when a court is reaching a decision it has to take account, and be consistent with, any decision already reached in an equal or higher court. The highest court in Scotland is the Court of Session, which august body decided last year that Dave King was 'fit and proper' to join the board of Sevco. This means that a precedent has been set allowing all manner of charlatans to fleece creditors by winding up a company and then immediately setting up a phoenix company with practically the same name. Essentially, our courts are helping to legalise fraud. It also means that Mike Ashley's case against the SFA will be a complete non-starter as the Court of Session very rarely overturns decisions made by its judges.
Then there was the hearing to decide if Wi-Fi company, 802 Works Ltd, could continue to have £300,000 of Sevco's money ring-fenced in case of insolvency. After perusing Sevco's books, the sheriff decided that the ring-fencing was unwarranted. This decision was wholly based on Sevco's accounts, the sheriff saying that they "did change the whole focus of the hearing". Fair enough, you might think, if the accounts showed a company in reasonable financial health. These accounts, however, were unaudited, which means they aren't worth the paper they're printed on. Again, a precedent has been set that means that any crooked businessman can present a set of Cordon Bleu books to a Sheriff Court and the sheriff will have to provide a very good reason for not accepting them.
Time to get the tin-foil hat on again. Remember the other day I reported how Lord Menzies, who made Chateau Charlie stump up a £50k bond, is a member of the prestigious and exclusive New Club in Edinburgh? Well, Lord Woolman, who passed Honest Dave as 'fit and proper' also happens to be a member of the Princes Street club. The New Club's membership is a closely-guarded secret and the information in 'Who's Who' about these judges being members probably came from the men themselves. One member that the club boasts about is Sean Connery. (Don't get me started on him!) One wonders who proposed Mr. Connery for membership? Which leading Edinburgh businessman was Connery known for being close to?
The New Club is a by-word for class snobbery and it is well known that its members generally come from Edinburgh's fee-paying schools. There have always been dark rumours surrounding the clique around this club and it is believed that many closed-doors deals are reached within its confines. It's certainly suspicious that top members of our judiciary meet in this clandestine club along with businessmen and politicians. And, as the majority of our top judges come from and live in Edinburgh, you can be sure that they all troop along to take luncheon at 84-87 Princes Street. You can read more about our top judges here. Be warned; you'll get angry!
If you follow me on Twitter you'll be aware that I've e-mailed the web editor of the DR to complain about the constant references to child abuse by The Peeppul on the paper's comments sections. I've threatened to contact the police if they don't do something about it. I might well just be pissing in the wind but a stand has to be taken. If you try to post anything about Old Rangers being cheats or how many of their titles are tainted your comment immediately goes into 'moderation' and then disappears without ever seeing the light of day. Meanwhile all manner of filth is allowed through and is left visible even when you report it. It'll be interesting to see if they get back to me.
And another story in the Daily Record about how Celtic is dominating Scottish football due to having more money than everyone else. Derek McInnes is quoted as saying, "Celtic brought in a player during the week which shows, again, the gulf between them and the rest. The fee and the boy’s wages would equate to my full footballing budget." So there you have it; money equals success and the team that can splash out on players is going to crush all opposition. This crops up all the time in our media. Strangely, though, Rangers gained no advantage whatsoever when they were bringing in top players using tax-payers money and using hidden contracts to cheat everybody!
Finally, I see some of The Peeppul are foaming at the mouth because the DR has a story about Gerry Adams's new book. To be honest, the book looks a load of shite, bringing together all Adams's idiosyncratic ramblings on Twitter. Obviously that's not what's got The Peeppul up in arms. One banger claims that this story's result will be that "Mirror group will destroy this once proud publication!!!" Er...who's that shaking hands with Adams in one of the pictures, the guy with the big ears? Maybe they want Prince Charles destroyed as well!
Not to be outdone, Gregory Campbell also has a book out, reflecting his thoughts, political concerns and leisure activities. It's a complete look into what his whole life is about.
Mr. Justice Peter Smith relaxes away from court.
Thursday, 21 January 2016
ADVENTURES IN THE SEVCO DIMENSION
The house we're renting just now doesn't have a TV aerial so we just use BBC iPlayer and other catch-up sites on the PS3. This means that the telly is off for most of the day and we don't end up watching a pile of shite like Bargain Hunt just because it's on. It also means that we don't have to pay for a TV licence. I'd recommend watching TV this way to anybody; it's easy to see the programmes you want to see and it's amazing how you don't miss all the pish you previously thought you couldn't do without.
I tend to be up at night and I watch a lot of those box sets and old DVDs that I got years ago but never got round to watching. At the moment I'm watching V, the original one, and the beginning automatically makes me think of The Peeppul. The blurb at the start says that the show is dedicated to all the brave resistance fighters throughout the world and I can't help wondering how the Huns would react to that. In fact, I'd imagine The Peeppul would be on the side of the aliens; until, of course, they found out that their skin is green!
I recently watched Breaking Bad and I honestly can't understand what all the fuss is about. There's folk claiming that it's the greatest TV show ever made, which I can't see at all. I guess there's no accounting for taste. A much better programme has been The Man in the High Castle, an alternative-history-type thing where the Nazis got the atomic bomb first and so the Germans and the Japanese won WWII. The USA is divided between Japan and Germany and there's lots of skulduggery between the two empires. There's also a kind of fantasy element with illegal films doing the rounds, which show an alternative reality where the Allies won. I'm waiting for Series 2 to find out what the significance is of these films.
Again, I thought of The Peeppul. Just imagine an alternative reality where Rangers paid their taxes, Murray didn't sell to Whyte and administration and liquidation never happened. Into this happy dimension is introduced the rumour of films showing a different reality, where everything went tits-up and Rangers died. There's a roaring, black-market trade in these films until, finally, somebody puts one on the internet for all to see. Can you imagine settling down to watch it and then looking at all the TV reports and newspaper stories shown in the film? The immediate reaction would be What the fuck? I thought the bastards had died!
That's what it feels like a lot of the time; as if we're living in an alternative reality where Rangers didn't die. More than that; our media does its best to make out that 'Rangers' is the most important team in Scotland and that they'll soon be in Europe, dominating every competition with a crowd of loan players, guys on short-term contracts and assorted Action Man's Heids from the bottom of the English FA barrel - oops! Sorry! Not supposed to bring that up. All of which makes laughable the story I read on The Clumpany about a group called 'Bears Fightback'. This group is nothing new; it's the old story with The Peeppul going through everything with a fine-tooth comb desperate to find something to be offended by. It's quite risible when you hear them calling others 'perma-offended' when they're the ones that go out their way to be offensive and then hate it when anybody says the least thing, no matter how anodyne.
I've mentioned on here before about the clown that chained himself to his veranda railings in the 1960s when the council decided to change all the verandas from a horrible bottle green to a much cheerier-looking sky blue. The council gave in and let him paint his own railings, which he did, painting them a Celtic green. He lived near the chapel and everybody used to laugh at him when coming out of mass. If they'd been changing the railings from blue to green I can't imagine any of The Peeppul laughing; they'd have marched on George Square, claiming it was a big Fenian conspiracy! I remember reading on a blog one of them saying how he never used to use the buses in Glasgow when they were painted green and white; he claimed that he walked everywhere rather than travel on these buses, which showed Glasgow Council's 'true colours'. They're really not right in the head!
And it's not just the Bare Bawsacks that are up in arms. The Daily Record ran an ill-advised story about the SPFL 'investigating' Sevco and Hearts; the latter for not keeping fans segregated, the former for sectarian singing. I say 'ill-advised' because the DR's readership, The Peeppul won't like it and it's not as if anything's ever going to actually be done, is it? As expected, The Peeppul have been on the DR forum in droves, doing what they do best - lashing out at everybody.
And so it goes on...child abuse, terrorist supporters...BJK etc. etc. etc. like a stuck record. I think the funniest one was about the Irish not having a right to Ireland and yet they'll all support Israel's claim, based on words written nearly three thousand years ago! And, again, we hear the demented cry that England doesn't want Celtic. They really don't get it, do they? Celtic are welcomed time and again to England to play in charity matches, testimonials etc. while they only ones that ever welcomed Rangers or Sevco were their bigoted brothers over in NI. Parallel universes right enough!
Further to this, I've currently been watching Celebrity Big Brother. (I know, I know; mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa!) Anyway, last night saw a game where they had to stand either on a square that said YES or one that said NO. They were asked if they thought other folk in the house were jealous of them; every single one of them stood in the NO box, while fat troublemaker Gemma stood alone in the YES box. I mean...why the hell would anyone be jealous of her? The way she speaks and acts it's fairly evident that she's envious of everyone else since she's a fat, talentless nobody. (I just tell it as I see it!)
I used to know somebody like that, who couldn't get on with his own life for worrying about how other folk were doing. Apparently, I shouldn't have been school Dux since I only started at the school at the beginning of Third Year, a fact that bothered nobody else. He could never be happy unless he was doing better than everyone, which effectively meant that he could only rejoice in other people's misery. He was jealous of everybody, for being better looking, earning more, being more intelligent, having better social skills etc. His main ambition in life was to find somebody, somewhere, to be jealous of him; an impossible feat, so his only recourse was to transfer his failings onto others, accusing them of being eaten up with jealousy and having chips on their shoulders. Not a happy chappy.
Now does that remind you of anyone? If you read the rantings of The Peeppul you'll constantly hear them grumbling about how 'Raynjurz' were banished to the lower divisions, through no fault of their own, but due to the jealousy of others. Apparently the supporters, and boards, of every team in Scotland were (and still are) insanely jealous of the 'most successful club' in the world, which also, seemingly, has the biggest fan base on the planet. As I said earlier, such expressions are usually an indication of transferring feelings of inferiority onto others; essentially, expecting others to feel the same way they do. The fact is that their 54 titles can never now be added to and everyone knows that a good chunk of them were achieved through cheating. It's hardly a sign of being the most successful club in Scotland, never mind the world! It's like somebody staying on at school until they're twenty-four and gaining 54 O Levels, while a classmate leaves school at 17, goes to university and by the age of 24 has got a PhD. Which one would you think has the more bragging rights? That European Cup has been a thorn in the side of The Peeppul for almost 49 years now and their club died trying to get it!
Speaking of 'auld acquaintance', as I was, I see that website Friends Reunited has closed down. Apparently, it's faced too much competition from the likes of Facebook but I think there's more to it than that. It was okay at first, laughing at somebody saying they were working in IT in Australia when you knew he was on the dole and living in a bedsit in Strathbungo, but then you're tempted to put your own details up. Before you know it you're contacted by old school 'chums' that you lost touch with a long time ago. And that's when you remember why you lost touch with them; they were arseholes! I think more than a few folk came to that realisation and abandoned the website in droves.
Finally, I see the Daily Record is continuing its love affair with Lady Muck, Michelle Mone. You never see a word against her in that rag, which casts serious doubts, if any still remained, on the paper's claim to socialist credentials. She's over in Barbados, gushing about being 'head over heels' in love. Obviously she's met some other mug with plenty of money. 'You can turn your life around' she simpers; yes, all you need is blond hair, big knockers and to marry into money. Sorted.
I would not like them
in the town.
I would not like them
anywhere.
I would not like them
I would not, could not,
in the grass.
What about Ibrox?
I would not like them at Ibrox.
A train! A train!
A train! A train!
Could you, would you
on a train?
I tend to be up at night and I watch a lot of those box sets and old DVDs that I got years ago but never got round to watching. At the moment I'm watching V, the original one, and the beginning automatically makes me think of The Peeppul. The blurb at the start says that the show is dedicated to all the brave resistance fighters throughout the world and I can't help wondering how the Huns would react to that. In fact, I'd imagine The Peeppul would be on the side of the aliens; until, of course, they found out that their skin is green!
I recently watched Breaking Bad and I honestly can't understand what all the fuss is about. There's folk claiming that it's the greatest TV show ever made, which I can't see at all. I guess there's no accounting for taste. A much better programme has been The Man in the High Castle, an alternative-history-type thing where the Nazis got the atomic bomb first and so the Germans and the Japanese won WWII. The USA is divided between Japan and Germany and there's lots of skulduggery between the two empires. There's also a kind of fantasy element with illegal films doing the rounds, which show an alternative reality where the Allies won. I'm waiting for Series 2 to find out what the significance is of these films.
Again, I thought of The Peeppul. Just imagine an alternative reality where Rangers paid their taxes, Murray didn't sell to Whyte and administration and liquidation never happened. Into this happy dimension is introduced the rumour of films showing a different reality, where everything went tits-up and Rangers died. There's a roaring, black-market trade in these films until, finally, somebody puts one on the internet for all to see. Can you imagine settling down to watch it and then looking at all the TV reports and newspaper stories shown in the film? The immediate reaction would be What the fuck? I thought the bastards had died!
That's what it feels like a lot of the time; as if we're living in an alternative reality where Rangers didn't die. More than that; our media does its best to make out that 'Rangers' is the most important team in Scotland and that they'll soon be in Europe, dominating every competition with a crowd of loan players, guys on short-term contracts and assorted Action Man's Heids from the bottom of the English FA barrel - oops! Sorry! Not supposed to bring that up. All of which makes laughable the story I read on The Clumpany about a group called 'Bears Fightback'. This group is nothing new; it's the old story with The Peeppul going through everything with a fine-tooth comb desperate to find something to be offended by. It's quite risible when you hear them calling others 'perma-offended' when they're the ones that go out their way to be offensive and then hate it when anybody says the least thing, no matter how anodyne.
I've mentioned on here before about the clown that chained himself to his veranda railings in the 1960s when the council decided to change all the verandas from a horrible bottle green to a much cheerier-looking sky blue. The council gave in and let him paint his own railings, which he did, painting them a Celtic green. He lived near the chapel and everybody used to laugh at him when coming out of mass. If they'd been changing the railings from blue to green I can't imagine any of The Peeppul laughing; they'd have marched on George Square, claiming it was a big Fenian conspiracy! I remember reading on a blog one of them saying how he never used to use the buses in Glasgow when they were painted green and white; he claimed that he walked everywhere rather than travel on these buses, which showed Glasgow Council's 'true colours'. They're really not right in the head!
And it's not just the Bare Bawsacks that are up in arms. The Daily Record ran an ill-advised story about the SPFL 'investigating' Sevco and Hearts; the latter for not keeping fans segregated, the former for sectarian singing. I say 'ill-advised' because the DR's readership, The Peeppul won't like it and it's not as if anything's ever going to actually be done, is it? As expected, The Peeppul have been on the DR forum in droves, doing what they do best - lashing out at everybody.
And so it goes on...child abuse, terrorist supporters...BJK etc. etc. etc. like a stuck record. I think the funniest one was about the Irish not having a right to Ireland and yet they'll all support Israel's claim, based on words written nearly three thousand years ago! And, again, we hear the demented cry that England doesn't want Celtic. They really don't get it, do they? Celtic are welcomed time and again to England to play in charity matches, testimonials etc. while they only ones that ever welcomed Rangers or Sevco were their bigoted brothers over in NI. Parallel universes right enough!
Further to this, I've currently been watching Celebrity Big Brother. (I know, I know; mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa!) Anyway, last night saw a game where they had to stand either on a square that said YES or one that said NO. They were asked if they thought other folk in the house were jealous of them; every single one of them stood in the NO box, while fat troublemaker Gemma stood alone in the YES box. I mean...why the hell would anyone be jealous of her? The way she speaks and acts it's fairly evident that she's envious of everyone else since she's a fat, talentless nobody. (I just tell it as I see it!)
I used to know somebody like that, who couldn't get on with his own life for worrying about how other folk were doing. Apparently, I shouldn't have been school Dux since I only started at the school at the beginning of Third Year, a fact that bothered nobody else. He could never be happy unless he was doing better than everyone, which effectively meant that he could only rejoice in other people's misery. He was jealous of everybody, for being better looking, earning more, being more intelligent, having better social skills etc. His main ambition in life was to find somebody, somewhere, to be jealous of him; an impossible feat, so his only recourse was to transfer his failings onto others, accusing them of being eaten up with jealousy and having chips on their shoulders. Not a happy chappy.
Now does that remind you of anyone? If you read the rantings of The Peeppul you'll constantly hear them grumbling about how 'Raynjurz' were banished to the lower divisions, through no fault of their own, but due to the jealousy of others. Apparently the supporters, and boards, of every team in Scotland were (and still are) insanely jealous of the 'most successful club' in the world, which also, seemingly, has the biggest fan base on the planet. As I said earlier, such expressions are usually an indication of transferring feelings of inferiority onto others; essentially, expecting others to feel the same way they do. The fact is that their 54 titles can never now be added to and everyone knows that a good chunk of them were achieved through cheating. It's hardly a sign of being the most successful club in Scotland, never mind the world! It's like somebody staying on at school until they're twenty-four and gaining 54 O Levels, while a classmate leaves school at 17, goes to university and by the age of 24 has got a PhD. Which one would you think has the more bragging rights? That European Cup has been a thorn in the side of The Peeppul for almost 49 years now and their club died trying to get it!
Speaking of 'auld acquaintance', as I was, I see that website Friends Reunited has closed down. Apparently, it's faced too much competition from the likes of Facebook but I think there's more to it than that. It was okay at first, laughing at somebody saying they were working in IT in Australia when you knew he was on the dole and living in a bedsit in Strathbungo, but then you're tempted to put your own details up. Before you know it you're contacted by old school 'chums' that you lost touch with a long time ago. And that's when you remember why you lost touch with them; they were arseholes! I think more than a few folk came to that realisation and abandoned the website in droves.
Finally, I see the Daily Record is continuing its love affair with Lady Muck, Michelle Mone. You never see a word against her in that rag, which casts serious doubts, if any still remained, on the paper's claim to socialist credentials. She's over in Barbados, gushing about being 'head over heels' in love. Obviously she's met some other mug with plenty of money. 'You can turn your life around' she simpers; yes, all you need is blond hair, big knockers and to marry into money. Sorted.
Orange Flegs and Lamb
(With apologies to Dr. Seuss.)
D'you like or-
ange flegs and lamb?
I do not like them,
Will-I-am.
I don't like or-
ange flegs and lamb.
Would you like them
Here or there?
I would not like them
here or there.
I would not like them
anywhere.
I do not like them,
Will-I-am.
I don't like or-
ange flegs and lamb.
Would you like them
in the town?
With a majorette man
dancing round?
ange flegs and lamb?
I do not like them,
Will-I-am.
I don't like or-
ange flegs and lamb.
Would you like them
Here or there?
I would not like them
here or there.
I would not like them
anywhere.
I do not like them,
Will-I-am.
I don't like or-
ange flegs and lamb.
Would you like them
in the town?
With a majorette man
dancing round?
I would not like them
in the town.
I would not like them
anywhere.
I do not like them,
Will-I-am.
I don't like or-
ange flegs and lamb.
Would you like them
at Level 5?
Pretending our dead club's
still alive?
Will-I-am.
I don't like or-
ange flegs and lamb.
Would you like them
at Level 5?
Pretending our dead club's
still alive?
I would not like them
at Level 5.
I would not like them
in the town.
I would not like them
anywhere.
in the town.
I would not like them
anywhere.
I do not like them,
Will-I-am.
I don't like or-
ange flegs and lamb.
Would you? Could you?
in the grass?
Will-I-am.
I don't like or-
ange flegs and lamb.
Would you? Could you?
in the grass?
Sitting with a
bonny lass?
I would not, could not,
in the grass.
Please shove the lot right
up your arse!
I would not like them
at Level 5.
I would not like them
in the town.
I would not like them
anywhere.
in the town.
I would not like them
anywhere.
I do not like them,
Will-I-am.
I don't like or-
ange flegs and lamb.
Will-I-am.
I don't like or-
ange flegs and lamb.
What about Ibrox?
Join me, please.
And we can sing about
bloody knees?
And we can sing about
bloody knees?
I would not like them at Ibrox.
I would not, could not,
in the grass.
in the grass.
Please shove the lot right
up your arse!
I would not like them
at Level 5.
I would not like them
in the town.
I would not like them
anywhere.
in the town.
I would not like them
anywhere.
I do not like them,
Will-I-am.
I don't like or-
ange flegs and lamb.
Will-I-am.
I don't like or-
ange flegs and lamb.
A train! A train!
A train! A train!
Could you, would you
on a train?
Oh, by fuck! Not you again!
I wouldn't like them on a train.
I would not like them at Ibrox.
I would not, could not,
in the grass.
in the grass.
Please shove the lot right
up your arse!
I would not like them
at Level 5.
I would not like them
in the town.
I would not like them
anywhere.
in the town.
I would not like them
anywhere.
I do not like them,
Will-I-am.
I don't like or-
ange flegs and lamb.
Will-I-am.
I don't like or-
ange flegs and lamb.
What about Keith
and the MSM?
Surely you'd enjoy
it with them?
Look, you stupid
Orange cunt,
I see I need to be
quite blunt.
I wouldn't like them on a train.
I wouldn't like them on a train.
I would not like them at Ibrox.
I would not, could not,
in the grass.
in the grass.
Please shove the lot right
up your arse!
I would not like them
at Level 5.
I would not like them
in the town.
I would not like them
anywhere.
in the town.
I would not like them
anywhere.
I do not like them,
Will-I-am.
I don't like or-
ange flegs and lamb.
Will-I-am.
I don't like or-
ange flegs and lamb.
Take your lamb
you love so well
And take it with you
down to Hell.
And take your flegs
And all that truck
right oot ma face
And get tae fuck!
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Wabs decides to give Kris Boyd another chance.
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