It wasn't until later in life, when I got dragged into training kids at school, that I actually got interested in the game. I learned all the ins-and-outs and how to control the ball, tackle, pass; all the things I should have learned at school. It was too late for me - the very idea of running the length of a football pitch has me reaching for the fags in terror - but I enjoyed getting all the children interested in the game and learning how to play. It used to annoy the hell out of me when the SFA regional guy would come for a visit. It was just like the old days. He would point out somebody that he said was a 'good wee player' and sign him up for training with the county team. Nine times out of ten he wasn't a 'good player' at all; he was a wee ned that everybody was scared to tackle, which made him look good! What the SFA should have been, and should be, doing is providing resources for all the kids to learn and train and we'd end up with a lot more good players for real.
Stay with me; I'll get to the point eventually. SFA involvement in primary schools is an absolute joke; unlike the SRU, who sent coaches into all the schools and provided equipment for the children to play non-contact rugby. All the children were involved and they really enjoyed it; until, that is, my class took part in a competition for P6s. It was a knockout competition and my class's team made it to the final, where they were up against a school from a posh area. A guy I didn't recognise refereed the final; he wasn't one of the SRU coaches that I'd seen taking charge of the other matches. I learned from some of the coaches that this guy had taken charge of all that school's matches. I soon discovered why.
As soon as the match started, my pupils were kicked and pushed all over the place. The idea of non-contact rugby is exactly that; no contact. Every player has two tags hanging down, velcroed to a belt. If one of these tags is pulled off the player has five seconds to pass the ball or he has to relinquish it. The posh school's tactic was to trip up or push a player to the ground, pull the tag off and then grab the ball. The referee stood by and let this happen, while I fumed on the touchline. I was quite proud of the fact that my pupils didn't react; I was scared that one or two of the harder cases might punch somebody, even the referee! Needless to say, the posh school won.
As my lot went to collect their runners-up medals, I complained loudly to the SRU official about how my class had been cheated. He explained, equally loudly, that he had been powerless to intervene since the offending referee was some high-heid-yin in the local education department (who was usually involved in organising football tournaments) and he had insisted on taking charge of those matches. The high-heid-yin eyed us both evilly. And I've got the cheek to wonder why I was bullied out of my job!
Part of my complaint to the SRU guy was that as soon as the injustice of the situation was evident the morale of my pupils went down. It affected their game visibly and there was a sort of 'why bother?' attitude seeping through them. Even if the other team hadn't cheated through the rest of the match, the damage done to the morale of my lot would have affected the result.
You'll have guessed what I'm on about now. Yes, the Celtic players are grown-up professionals and not children but such injustices can still impact on their morale. The same thing has probably happened to most of us in our daily lives. Even something trivial where you end up being blamed though it wasn't your fault can spoil your whole day, affecting your concentration and stopping you from doing your job properly.
It's even worse if you see somebody else being treated differently. You'll feel angry, hard-done-by and miserable. And that's what happened to Celtic on Sunday. A blatant hand-ball was ignored by the officials, even though they were in a perfect position to see it. Then, later in the match, the officials suddenly developed twenty-twenty vision when it was a Celtic player involved in breaking the rules. It was an absolutely shameful, blatant display of cheating by the SFA officials; there's no other explanation for it. I'm glad Celtic have complained officially and it'll be interesting to see what feeble excuses the SFA come up with. I wouldn't be surprised, though, if it ends in Celtic being hauled up for 'bringing the game into disrepute'!
While The Peeppul and their friends in the media gloat and spout their default mantra of 'always cheated, never defeated', it's worth noting that nobody seems to be censuring Wrang-Door McCall about his ridiculous complaints. Apparently, it's 'no fair' that there are some Bisto FC players that might miss the play-offs if they get one more yellow card. You've got to laugh at McCall when he says, "I'm not saying this just for Rangers, it’s for everyone. It won’t happen this season but maybe in the future.” Aye, right! The answer, of course, is simple; just make sure the players don't do anything wrong! And if you can't trust them, then don't play them.
Then again, this is an Ibrox team we're talking about. A team that our authorities insist is 'stull Raynjurz'. That being the case, I think we all know what McCall's wee greetin' match is really all about. It's a call to the officials to let them know that none of his players should be booked from now until everything's done and dusted. Darren McGregor and Kenny Miller are most in danger and I bet nothing short of murder will merit either of them so much as a talking-to between now and the end of the season!
You can read my take on the recruitment of Scotland's referees here. I think you'll find that there's more than an element of truth in it!
The Scottish Referees' Association marches to Hampden to protest at being labelled partisan.
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