JABBA THE AGNIVORE

THE LAXATIVE IS ON ITS WAY!

Have a look at this guy. Does he remind you of anyone? He looks like a young go-getter, somebody that's out to make his mark in the world and won't let anyone stand in his way. His name is Colin Kingsnorth. I was surprised to discover that he is actually forty-nine years old. Either he is in remarkably good nick or the Daily Record is using an old photo! Anyway, the photo reminded me of a young David Murray. They both have a lot in common; both come from a monied background, both attended expensive, fee-paying schools, both have built up businesses and both have, or had, an interest in buying into the team that plays at Ibrox. There, however, the similarities end.

While Murray built up an empire that included manufacturing, service industries and a football team, Kingsnorth is just in for the quick buck. His modus operandi makes him look like some throw-back to  the 1980s, a modern-day Gordon Gekko. Not for him the arduous task of building a company from scratch or even buying into a successful business; he is just about making money, nothing more.

Of course, there's nothing wrong with wanting to make money but it's the way this guy goes about it that's the problem. He buys a small stake in a company and then causes all manner of trouble in the boardroom to force through high payments to shareholders. The reason he can cause so much bother with a small amount of shares is apparently due to some little-known part of Company Law. It seems that if you get 100 shareholders together, no matter how many shares each has, you can force votes, board meetings and EGMs. Kingsnorth's way of exploiting this is that he spreads his shares through all different subsidiary companies. He, himself, then, constitutes 100 shareholders! Clever stuff!

He has left a trail of destruction behind him, even forcing out directors! He usually succeeds in forcing through  shareholders being given a share of the profits. This is bad news for Trigger's Brush FC, which needs any profits to build a team and plan for the future, if it has one. If this guy gets his way then TBFC will end up at a complete standstill. No wonder he calls his company Laxey; he'll certainly be causing a lot of messy toilet bowls down Govan way!

Meanwhile there is still debate going on about whether or not Trigger's Brush FC is a new team. Some clowns still compare what happened at Ibrox to what happened at Celtic in 1994. They say that McCann transferred the assets of Celtic Football and Athletic Club to some 'holding company' called Pacific Shelf, which was subsequently changed to Celtic FC. This is exactly the same as what Green did, they argue. In this they show at best remarkable disingenuousness, at worst a remarkable lack of brains!

The Big Lie says that Green bought the assets and the business of Rangers Football Club Ltd, without buying the company. This is, of course, impossible. Although the word 'business' is often used as a synonym for 'company' it is, in fact, an intangible substance, the day-to-day transactions of the company. You cannot open a new shop and buy an old shop's 'business.' This would mean that your new shop would inherit all the suppliers, contracts and customers of the old shop. This is absolutely impossible unless you actually buy the old shop. Even then, the suppliers and customers are under no obligation to keep doing business with you. Granted, there are circumstances where the customers are tied in, for example with a bank or building society but, again, the company would have to be taken over, not the business on its own.

When McCann bought Celtic he bought the whole company, lock, stock, barrel and business! This required him to buy out the shares of those in power, meaning the Kellys and Whites would have made something out of the deal. This is manifestly not what happened at Rangers. Did any shareholders receive payment? Buying over the company and business of Celtic also meant that McCann inherited the company's debts. If Green, as The Big Lie tries to make out, bought the business of Rangers then he would have inherited the debts likewise.

Liquidation means that a company, and, consequently, its business, is no longer for sale. The assets should be sold to the highest bidders, together or separately, to pay the creditors. Just because Duff and Phelps did some back-door, shady, possibly illegal transfer of all the assets does not mean that Green bought the company or its business.

As to all the 'Pacific Shelf' nonsense, McCann transferred ownership of the whole company into this umbrella organisation, just as David Murray transferred ownership of Rangers to his MIH umbrella company. Murray could have changed the name of the Rangers company to anything he liked, as could McCann. That McCann dropped the 'Athletic' bit from Celtic's name means absolutely nothing.

Green bought nobody's shares but simply bought the assets. He used a new company to buy these assets, Sevco 5088 or Sevco Scotland or whatever, and started afresh. All the business of the old company vanished; he had to start afresh. He had to seek new sponsors, convince suppliers and contractors of the old company to do business with him and, above all, he had to convince customers, the supporters, to transfer their business to his new company or club. It is quite feasible that all the supporters of Rangers might have decided that their team was dead and that this new club was nothing to do with them. The fact that they snapped up the cheap season tickets in droves does not mean, in any way, that this new team was still Rangers, no matter what they might say to the contrary!

Somebody decided to post yesterday on Bill McMurdo's blog claiming that Celtic were doing something underhand in respect of paying tax. Unfortunately, like most Brushers, the guy is just a couple of steps up from illiteracy so it was difficult, if not downright impossible, to understand exactly what he was getting at. Perhaps someone with a bit more education and erudition might translate his gobbledegook and we can see if there is, indeed, any cause for concern.

The guy who posted this stuff called himself, 'Pharez, Zarah and Judah.' Obviously this is some kind of Biblical reference but I did not understand it. I googled the three names and found out that the use of these three names, Pharez and Zarah being twin sons of Judah, the leader of one of the Twelve Tribes of Israel, is generally in some lunatic arguments that our present Royal Family is directly descended from Judah! Given the Nazi sympathies of many of the Saxe-Coburg family, can you imagine how they would react to being told that they have Jewish blood? And imagine the reaction of the country's number-one bigot, the Chookyembra himself, Prince Philip! By God, he'd have apoplexy!

'Judah? Judah? Whawt the heh-all are you tawking abite? Do Ay look bladdy Jewish to you?'