NAZI TIMS FUCK OFF

Remember last September, how we were told that 'Democracy has spoken' and that it was 'Time to move on'? It's a different story now. There's mention everywhere in the media about how incongruous it is that the SNP have over 90% of Scottish seats with only 50% of the vote. Isn't it funny how they weren't interested in electoral reform when the chance came to vote for it in 2011? It was the SNP that was in the forefront of advocating change, while Scottish Labour and its friends in the media were at best lukewarm about the idea and at worst downright hostile. They've got the system they wanted and now they're blaming that system for the fact that they've lost. Sounds like a certain, new football club, eh?

As for moving on, it looks like Jim Murphy has no intention of doing so. While party leaders are resigning left, right and centre, Murphy clings doggedly on, even though, under his stewardship, Scottish Labour has lost a whole country! His claim that Scottish Labour "cannot afford another period of introspection" effectively translates as his having done nothing wrong and it's all our fault for voting SNP. This theme is continued by somebody called Anna Smith, who is, apparently, a best-selling author and ex-Daily Record reporter. She says, "No matter what Labour said throughout this campaign, these people weren't listening" and "How can so many people be deluded? It is as though half of Scotland is in the grip of some collective nervous breakdown." Aye, that's right, hen! How dare we vote the way we want instead of the way you want us to! These people, eh?

Smith moans about young people dismissing the Labour Party's history, while Murphy says, "We have been beaten by a party who claimed our heritage, clothed themselves in our values, and copied many of our policies." If I move down to London and swan about in expensive, designer gear to try to impress all the money men, I can hardly complain if I come home to find that my wife has handed my old Debenhams suits into the Oxfam shop and somebody else is wearing them! Murphy and his cronies have spent decades telling the folk dahn sarf that they're 'New' Labour and yet they expect to come up here and try to claim all the history of the 'Old' Labour. My God, the similarities with Sevco are piling up!

Labour has been trying to wear Tory clothes since the 1980s. While Tory judges illegally stopped the NUM from accessing its own funds and Tory-led police forces were out beating up miners, Labour stood by and never lifted a finger. The 'Militant Tendency' was driven out of the party, leaving behind ersatz Tories, who abandoned all the old Labour principles in the pursuit of votes in the Home Counties. And Scottish Labour is no different; in fact, Johann Lamont being driven out shows that SLab was just expected to be a branch office of the London party.

If anything, the results of this election show how different Scotland is politically from England, especially the South of England. This is something that the whole of the UK is going to have to face up to. We don't want to be ruled by an Eton-educated elite; or a Fettes-educated one either! We don't want austerity, we don't blame immigrants for all our problems, we want the real culprits, the bankers and moneymen held to account for the current economic mess. The majority in England doesn't seem to share this outlook. Something's going to have to give.

Now that the election is over, the Unionists haven't given up on the 'Fear and Smear'. Our old friend, JK Rowling is back in the Daily Record, greeting, as usual, about 'Cybernats'. If you're going to stick your neck out to champion a political party online (or a football team, for that matter), you have to expect that others won't agree with you and won't hold back in letting you know. I've already had two trolls on the Amazon page for 'Fear and Smear' and if I was as well-known as JK Rowling I'm sure there would be hundreds, if not thousands, of similar halfwits posting. And go and look at Mick's blog. There are a few folk thumbing comments down, but only one actually brave enough to come out of hiding. Unfortunately, he's got nothing to offer but abuse. So Rowling, and other Unionists, are not alone. Besides, it's pretty clear that not all of Rowling's abusers are so-called Cybernats.

So much for the barrage of abuse she claims to get! One deluded character calling her a 'traitor to Scotland', even though she's English and a UKIP racist berating her for being left-wing. So where are all these abusive 'Cybernats'? Anyone would think that they don't really exist!

Probably the most shocking things I've seen about the election are on, of all places, Phil Mac Giolla Bhain's blog. There are folk on there, apparently Celtic supporters, bemoaning, and even denouncing, the SNP. I know every support is going to have its share of Tories and other right-wing nutters, but the way some of these characters go on is shameful. One berates Mhairi Black for seemingly announcing on Twitter a while back that she 'hates Celtic'. (I see the Record website has resurrected this story today for a bit of mischief-making.) It's a bit sad that anybody would base their politics on which team a candidate supports (or doesn't). I remember back in the 1980s Charlie Nicholas showing up at a Conservative rally; did that have Celtic supporters running out to vote Tory? And I don't remember any of these moaners having a go at Brendan O'Hara!

And there's even worse than that. There's one guy going on about all the dole scroungers and immigrants on benefits. What the hell is somebody like that doing supporting Celtic? Brother Walfrid must be spinning in his grave. I gave up after reading one clown banging on about the 'Threadneedle Street Jews' running the banks in this country. If this guy was representative of the Celtic support, I think I'd be agreeing wholeheartedly with Mhairi Black.

Good luck to QOS today; they're going to need it. Not that Bisto FC is anything to worry about and the Daily Record are getting the excuses in early - their article on the match mentions 'artificial pitch' in just about every paragraph. It's the match officials they need to worry about as there'll no doubt be 'honest mistakes' galore. And if Queens are winning at the full-time mark you can put all the cash you have on an unprecedented amount of added time being played. They'll probably have to keep on playing until Monday night for 'Boydy' to get his fat carcass near the QOS goal.

Finally, I tend to think of myself as being of well above average intelligence and I had a good education, back in the days when you didn't have to mortgage your future to go to university. There are limits, though, to what I can understand, especially when it's not my area. For example, I've got lost halfway through a couple of Horizon programmes going into minute details about astronomy and I had to re-read 'A Brief History of Time' slowly, flicking back the pages now and again to check things, before I gained some understanding of what the hell Stephen Hawking was on about. I tend to get annoyed when I can't understand something and persevere until I do, or think I do; unless, of course, it's something boring like accountancy, or pretentious, like a Samuel Beckett novel. There are times, though, when you just have to admit defeat. I've met my Waterloo and have the white flag flying. I just can't get what portpower is on about in many of his posts on Bampots Utd. Come on, mate; dumb it down a bit, please!

"Well, abslootly! I agree with everything Jim says. He's hit the nail right on the head. It's the same ones that had it in for Rangers that have kicked the Scottish Labour Party when it's down. And I think we all know the ones I mean, eh? We need to start working now to get Jim into the Scottish Parliament, where he's promised to look into those land deals in Lennoxtown. And can I, once again, refute any allegations that I'm acting in self interest here. There's more than enough work for two gardeners in Glasgow."