Sunday, 3 May 2015


Well, that's it. The champions of each league have been determined and it's congratulations to Celtic, Hearts, Morton and Albion Rovers. As for Bisto FC, they won't be going anywhere in a hurry. They're going to have to fight their way through six games if they want to avoid being stuck in the Championship for at least another year. Honest Mistakes and masses of extra time in each game aside, they haven't a hope in hell. The Peeppul know it as well and many of them on their forums can't see them making it past QOS, never mind Hibs or Motherwell. So it looks as if promotion to the Premiership will have to wait for another time.

I wonder if Big Sandy Easdale is laughing his arse off at the state of the new club, which is probably going to spend next season in the same league as his local team, Morton. Now there's an idea. Why doesn't Sandy start investing in Morton? He could get others to join in to see if they can get the team into the Premiership next May. That would certainly stick two fingers up to the Real Raynjurz Men! He could even have a share issue on the AIM market. I'm sure there are plenty of folk out there that would snap them up!

The Bisto board still seems determined not to charge ST holders for the home legs of the play-offs, while the SPFL says that they're not allowed to. I can't make out what the hell is happening here as the SPFL had already claimed that it was willing to let clubs decide for themselves. Obviously the SPFL is full of Raynjurz-Haturz! Either that or they're pissed off at the way Bisto FC went about things. Hibs last year asked permission; Bisto FC INFORMED the SPFL that they were not going to charge ST holders. That arrogance has evidently got some backs up. The SPFL should just let them go ahead; it's only one match anyway as they're going to get totally fucked by QOS.

The situation, however, has thrown up some unlikely reactions. I mentioned the other day how McMurdo's Mob doesn't exactly trust the new board's motives. Now we've got the Sons of Struth whining on behalf of ST holders. That's a turn-up for the books. It wasn't that long ago that Halloween Houston and his cohorts were calling those that had bought season books 'traitors' and 'not real Raynjurz supporturz'. It seems they've changed their tune and those quislings that bought season tickets are now authentic members of The Peeppul after all.

I see Ann Budge has had a go at the SPFL, claiming that it has an 'outdated product' and a 'negative image'. She maintains that if she wasn't involved in football she wouldn't sponsor the SPFL. She goes on, "We talk a lot about what’s wrong with Scottish football as opposed to what is right with it. Okay we have problems but there are some good things going on." And there's what the problem is right there: it's impossible to sell a product that everybody slags off and hasn't a good word to say about. There is also the small problem of corruption. These problems don't lie with the SPFL; we need to look elsewhere.

The SFA needs to be cleaned out. This particular Augean Stable stinks with its long association with one rancid team that's now dead. The Frankenstein's Monster created from the body parts is touted as still the same club and SFA officials try to prove the point by favouring it at every turn. Eleven minutes added time there was in last week's match against Falkirk! This makes our game a laughing stock in the footballing world and in the world in general. As Ann Budge says, there is a lot of good in our game, but the rotten bits need to be excised so that those good parts can flourish.

And then there's our media. According to our Fourth Estate, the titles won by the Scottish Champions for the last four years are 'tainted'. And this is supposed to make the SPFL attractive to sponsors? Rangers (sic) were 'relegated' due to 'money troubles' and the petty envy of every other football club in Scotland. Scottish football is doomed until Celtic and Rangers (sic) are in the same league so all we should be concerned about is getting Rangers (sic) into the Premiership. Every other club can go to hell, no matter how well they're doing. They simply don't matter. So the SPFL has to go out looking for a sponsor with the Scottish media running down the football product in this country. The best of it is that Jackson et al do all this and then blame the SPFL for not selling Scottish football. Have a look at the papers, Ann, and see how disappointed they all are that your team won the Championship. It wasn't supposed to happen that way!

The article about Ann Budge displays another example of what I was talking about the other day: the poor spelling and grammar in the Daily Record. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not the kind of pedant that goes round blogs correcting everybody's writing; but we're talking about what passes as a newspaper in these parts. I mean, look at this: "The woman who helped turn Hearts around has came out and criticised the SPFL". That's primary-school stuff, as is this one, telling us that Kate Middleton "had went into labour". I always thought you had to have some kind of basic literacy to work on a paper; even one like the Daily Record. It looks as if I was wrong. And, for the Record, you 'pore' over documents; you don't 'pour' over them! How hard can it be to look in a dictionary?

And one of those stories leads me onto my final rant. The sick, the unemployed, the underpaid; all of them are continually demonised in our media. It's become so ubiquitous that ordinary folk actually make ridiculous statements they think are true. My own daughter, ever since she got herself a well-paid job, has metamorphosed into Margaret Thatcher, raving about all the 'spongers' out there, eating up her money in taxes; money that she has to work hard for. She's caused me to lose my temper on quite a few occasions; little shit. It always annoys the hell out of me when folk want to take away the pittance that the poorest in our society have to live on.

I always believed that it is the duty of all of us to take care of those that can't look after themselves. I'm not just talking about the long-term sick and the elderly; there is a good proportion of those that are unemployed that just never got the breaks in life. While I was being taught to read and tell the time at the age of four, other children were neglected or, worse, abused. Such children can't cope with school but nothing is done to help them. I could tell you stories about some of the children I've taught that would break your heart! It's a miracle that some of these kids grow up actually being able to sign their names; one or two that I taught couldn't even do that in P7! What kind of work can these children look forward to? And, yet, while they're signing on, trying to find a real job instead of Workfare or zero-hours contracts, they're constantly lambasted in the media for being lazy. This is Thatcher's legacy; 'no such thing as society'.

And then we get the real parasites, another of which everyone was celebrating yesterday. It makes my blood boil to see all those arse-licking bastards, camped outside a hospital to wave a plastic flag at another burden on the taxpayer. Those same, sycophantic mugs are the very ones that whine the most about the unemployed. Yet, that private maternity room where baby parasite was born probably cost far more for that short stay than most of those unemployed 'spongers' get in a year!

I've said it before and I'll say it again, those that want the Royal Family should be the only ones paying for them. "But they're great ambassadors for British businesses!" is the usual excuse for keeping these leeches going; well, then, let British businesses pay for them. If they do such great work in this respect then I'm sure businesses will be lining up to sponsor them. Mike Ashley could cut them a good deal, so long as Buckingham Palace gets renamed 'Sports Direct Palace' and the Sports Direct logo is displayed on all their cars and carriages. Even The Peeppul would be happy; replica Bisto tops could be sold at the 'Sports Direct Palace' gift shop. They could then seriously claim that they're the Queen's XI. More than that; they might be able to buy shares in the holding company that owns the Royal Family!

If this shower of shite can't get sponsorship then they should be made to...gasp...work for a living. Which, of course, brings us full circle. What the hell could this bunch of inbred halfwits actually do? I'm afraid Workfare is the only answer!

"Well tattoo me ahrse with a Death's Head and call me a Nazi sympathiser! The boundah's put the bally things everywhere. The whole fahking hice is covered in 'em! I knew I should've stayed in Greece. Thet naice Mr Onassis had offered me a good job as well!"

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