Tuesday, 28 July 2015


My God, they never learn, do they? Kenny 'Two Coats' Miller is fulsome in his praise of himself and his teammates. They were magnificent, apparently, and they're going to keep improving so every other team in Scotland, if not in Europe, should be afraid. This is the man, remember, that told us that there wasn't much to choose between Sevco and Celtic just before his team got beaten by Raith Rovers! He really should keep that big gob shut! The rest of The Peeppul are just as bad; going on about big smiles on their faces and how they're going to beat Celtic if they're drawn in one of the cup competitions. The best ones, though, are the ridiculous claims on the Daily Record 'Hotline'.

"We’ll win the league this season, next season we’ll challenge Celtic and win the Premiership and the following year we’ll be back in the Champions League. Mark my words."

"I’m excited about the season ahead as I think we’ll do great things."

"Rangers were superb against Hibs. Their passing game was great to watch".

And the best one of all:

"That was a world-class performance from Rangers against Hibs."

World class? They beat a team that was not at its best because of the mind games played by Sevco and this claes-pole thinks that's 'world class'? Bring on the Rovers and let's see what they're made of!

The agnivores, of course, are joining in, banging on about the 'Warburton Revolution' even more now. So what's so 'revolutionary' about Warburton's approach? Well, he's doing innovative things like demanding fitness from his players and laying down the law about diet. I suppose that is quite revolutionary for Sevco, where Sooperally's idea of training was, "Wance roon' the track, boays, an' then wull go furra pizza!" In fact, after all his hard work when he was at Kilmarnock, I'd swear Kris Boyd actually put on weight last year! It's no more, though, than other managers have been doing for ages, including Ronny Deila. Strangely, though, when Deila was demanding this level of professionalism from his players he was derided for being a petty control freak. But I'm probably just saying this out of fear and envy!

Not all The Peeppul are joining in the celebrations and plans for world domination. McMurdo's 'Rangers (sic) Supporters Loyal' have got nothing good to say at all. It's all doom and gloom as far as they're concerned; but, then, they're probably being a bit more realistic than their peers. Honest Dave is skint, Ashley won't hand over another penny without putting more onerous contracts in place and it's hardly worth getting overexcited about goals being scored if there's no longer a club to score goals for!

Meanwhile, I can't understand all the fuss being made about this Lord Sewel character; or rather, I can. It's just more deflection from the real scandal. So he snorted cocaine and cavorted with prostitutes; big deal! Now that's what I want to be like at that age, instead of sucking a Victory V while tapping my tartan baffies to a Jimmy Shand record. They were all consenting adults; so who has he hurt? Unless, of course, the prostitutes were Eastern Europeans forced into it; in that case he'd deserve to be shot. And while his flat has the door kicked in and then is ransacked by the police, Lord Janner still turns up for his daily pay-cheque.

Interestingly, Lord Sewell's flat is in Dolphin Square. Sound familiar? It should; that's where all the Westminster child-abuse parties took place. No battering rams or mob-handed police teams turning up to investigate those, though, eh? The most disgusting thing about this Sewel business is not what the man himself got up to but the sheer hypocrisy shown by Westminster and the media. It seems that taking drugs and paying for sex are far worse sins that raping young children. This country turns my stomach at times!

With no irony intended, I am actually surprised about all the fuss being made about this man Jeremy Corbyn. I'm not talking about the attacks on him; I mean the way a lot of folk in Scotland are falling over themselves to support him. Why bother? The man will be completely unelectable in the South of England, just like Michael Foot, and will cause the same split in the Labour Party as happened in the 1980s. To be honest, it's no longer any of our business and we should just leave the English Labour Party to get on with it. Let's focus on Scotland instead.

Now that the Tories have a majority in Westminster they can push through all the stuff they failed to pass when they were in a coalition. One major item is the bill to make changes to the electorate. They want to reduce the number of MPs from 650 to 600. Even that was a compromise figure, since they originally wanted to cut the number even further. They're also going to redraw constituency boundaries. In some cases this can be seen to be justified, such as in the massive Isle of Wight constituency, which has an electorate of nearly 111,000. The plan to split this in two, however, is in stark contrast to boundaries being redrawn in other areas, such as in Devon and Cornwall, taking no account of local boundaries. It surely can't be a coincidence that the Isle of Wight is largely dependent on the braying hordes that attend Cowes Week and other upper-class entertainments and, more often than not, returns a Tory MP.  

It's easy to guess where the cuts in MPs will happen, with Scotland and Wales marked out for special treatment as they are 'over-represented'. In effect, this will favour the Tories and shows no respect for the fact that the UK is meant to be a union of nations. The Tories' bill will treat Scotland as being no more than a region of England. No wonder Alex Salmond is saying that another referendum on independence is inevitable.

The truth is that Scotland and much of England are growing further and further apart politically. Jeremy Corbyn may be the poster boy of campaigners for social fairness, like Russell Brand and Charlotte Church, but among the ordinary, English electorate he is seen as a throwback to values that many in England no longer espouse. Scotland is entirely different. Yes, we've got our share of forelock-tuggers and the selfish but the attitudes of 'Me, me, me' and 'Thanks, guv'nor, yer a real gent!' are not as endemic in Scotland as they are in the South of England, where, unfortunately, the majority of the UK electorate resides.

The most ironic thing that strikes me about politics in Scotland is how egalitarian principles came about. It's mostly down to the Reformation. Even though a lot of the egalitarian claims were a myth, the fact remains that many of Scotland's early trades union and Labour Party leaders came from a Church background. So why is it that members of the Orange Order are violently opposed to any kind of socialist agenda, tug their forelocks to their 'betters' as much as Southern English folk and are as right-wing as any London taxi driver? Strange.

Finally, I see my book has been knocked off the Number 1 spot by Chugg's nedography. I suppose you can't stay at the top forever. Still, it was nice while it lasted and there's always the chance that I'll get there again. You can do your bit, as well as enjoying a good read, by purchasing 'Never Mind the Zombies' in paperback or Kindle! And, please, remember to write a review on Amazon.

Find out more and buy the book here.

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