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Wednesday 28 October 2015

A LEVEL 5 PLAYING FIELD

Well, it looks as if we were right about Jackson's 'attack' on Honest Dave. He was just paving the way, like John the Baptist, for the Messiah to bless us all with another of his statements. Honest Dave had actually 'jetted in' on Monday; something I'm sure Jackson would have been aware of. To paraphrase King's statement, "Everything's Ashley's fault. We can't afford a court case but the cunt can whistle for his money." So, essentially just another bout of deflection. They're good at that.

Speaking of deflection, the media are going into overdrive with their agenda against Celtic, especially the Daily Leveller. Their latest story is about a 'bust-up' on the training field between Ciftci and Izaguirre. They've got a picture of Izaguirre being led away, blood running down his cheek as if he'd been in a fight with the Razor King from 'No Mean City'. In reality, it was an accident, over which both players had an argument that was quickly over and sorted out. The Record, though, can't help mentioning Ciftci's alleged bite last season, as well as the "heated discussion" between Commons and Deila last week. They're absolutely determined to convince everybody that there's serious trouble at Celtic Park.

Another little point showed up in this non-story. Who the hell is the sports editor these days at the Record, Doctor Who? This incident happened on Tuesday and was reported on Tuesday. Then we get this bit, "Celtic manager Ronny Deila confirmed the altercation when he spoke to the media on Wednesday." So now they're reporting tomorrow's news! Still, I suppose that's easily done when you live in the twilight zone where dead clubs are still alive and Third Lanark's looking forward to a good run in the Scottish Cup.

They've even dragged Packie Bonner into their insane, wee world, to tell Ronny Deila what he's going to have to do to hold onto his job. Apparently, "Deila must win the league and at least one cup as well as deliver European football after Christmas" if he wants to stay in charge at Celtic. What is it with these fucking Uncle Tims, always ready to stick the boot in for a handful of filthy lucre? There's nothing wrong with an ex-player offering advice, or even criticism, but this is something different. Surely Bonner could see that he's playing into the hands of people with an agenda? Then again, as I've always said, footballers aren't renowned for being the brightest lights on the Christmas tree!

The worst example, however, of this desperate attempt to cast a shadow over Celtic Park is how the court case involving Paul Paton has been reported. "Dundee United star Paul Paton fined £500 after punching former Celtic keeper Lukasz Zaluska - after a threat the goalie wanted to 'kill all Rangers fans'" screams the Daily Record headline. Now that fine is hardly going to make a dent in Paton's pocket but he was found guilty; not that the Record is interested in anything like that. They're more concerned about Zaluska's outburst on Byres Road. It hardly sounds like something anyone would shout in the street, does it? It sounds more like Bender from Futurama!

So, how do the agnivores at the Record know what Zaluska shouted in the street? Well, Mark Wilson, friend of Paul Paton, claimed in court that that's what happened that night. No other witness said anything about this supposed outburst and, in fact, their testimony suggested that such a thing didn't happen. The Daily Record, however, has taken Wilson's word as gospel. Even worse was the headline earlier on Tuesday before a verdict was delivered:

"Former Celtic goalkeeper Lukasz Zaluska shouted he 'hated Rangers' and 'wanted to kill all Rangers fans' on day he was allegedly attacked".

You see what they did there? The attack was alleged but Zaluska's outburst, which, incidentally, is only an allegation, is presented as if that's what really happened. If I were Zaluska, I'd be looking for a lawyer right now. It doesn't even have to be a good lawyer; anyone can see that this disgusting rag is painting Zaluska as the villain, even though he was the one that was attacked!

Of course, The Peeppul are all over the story, spouting hypocritical shite about how bigoted and racist Celtic and its support are. They've already started going on about the 'troubles' at Celtic Park and are making ironic claims that 'Ronny must stay'. It certainly looks like job done as far as Level 5 is concerned; The Peeppul's attention is well-and-truly not on what's going on at Ibrox!

The determination of the Tories to get their bill on tax credits through the Lords was shown in how they got Andrew Lloyd-Webber to 'jet in' especially for the occasion. The Labour peers decided to abstain, as usual, while the repulsive Michelle Mone picked up her £300 for voting many people into poverty. Among the other peers voting for the Tories' vile bill was Lord Ian Livingston, who, unfortunately, is on the board of Celtic FC. I noticed on Twitter that a petition has been started to get Livingston off the Celtic board. I don't know if it will do any good or not, but I certainly signed it. If you want to do the same, click this link.

I've had a few entries for the competition. None of them are correct, but a couple have given me a good laugh. Remember, if nobody gets the answer right then I'm giving the prize to the funniest! By the way, I've never heard of Fairview High School and a Baccalaureate is akin to A-Levels. The way you're meant to write your qualifications is: degrees come first, then postgraduate qualifications, and then membership of professional bodies. There's a clue there. Send your entries to 'andersonpat43@gmail.com'.




"Ah wish folk wid stoap wi' aw this shite aboot me jist writin' what Level 5 tell mae tae write. It's a load-a pish, so it is. Wait a minute - Comin' Mr. Traynor, sir! Wiz that wan sugar ur two, sir?"

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