STUPID, STUPID

I don't know any big supergroups these days, if there are any, and, rather than make an arse of myself, I won't even try to name one. I think once you get to a certain age then current music is none of your business anymore; it's not made for the likes of me anyway! Imagine you were a guitarist and had built up a good reputation appearing with various bands and as a session musician. The Rolling Stones/The Who/The Clash (delete where appropriate) are going on tour and contact you to play with them. Also going on tour is the Abba tribute band Bjorn Again and they want you to play with them as well. Which one would you choose? I think most normal people would make their excuses to Bjorn Again! Not The Peeppul, though! How else to explain the abuse they've been giving Chris Sutton? As Monti always says, stupid, stupid Huns!

And down Ibrox way it looks like things are just carrying on the same way as always. The Daily Record is all excited about Mark Warburton's first signing, Rob Kiernan, a defender, from Wigan Athletic. Of course, as far as the DR is concerned, he's the best thing since...no, I think there's been enough of that! As usual, however, the ones at Sevco don't seem to understand the phrase, 'caveat emptor'. The 'small print' in the article shows that. In one part he's described as a "much-travelled defender", which obviously means that either he can't settle or nobody wants him. There's also the small matter of Birmingham City, for whom he played on loan last season. Birmingham were going to sign him permanently but "the Blues had cancelled the move following concerns over his medical." Sevco then "immediately stepped in with a bid which has been accepted by the Latics." Oh dear! Monti! We need your catchprase again!

As Shaun pointed out yesterday, Warburton hasn't really got a lot of experience being a football manager. He was appointed at Brentford in the middle of the 2013-2014 season and one of the players, Alan McCormack, said that "a change in management often means a new man bringing in their own staff and own ideas, but he (Warburton) has kept it pretty much the same, just making one or two changes." In other words, he didn't actually do much. Brentford got to the Championship but the fact that they were ready to let Warburton go even though they got into the play-offs for the Premiership in 2015 doesn't say much for him. In reality, he's pretty much an untested, unknown quality. But not to worry; Mr Dignity has already offered his services if Warburton needs any help or advice. So if Warburton wants to know how to sign a cheque, he knows who to ask.

I've noticed that a couple of specimens of Hundom have been in the news, getting away with being filthy bigots and complete cunts as usual. First, was the fat git that abused the SNP guy selling the Big Issue. He's got previous for hate crimes but, instead of being banged up in 'The Big Hoose', he's been given community service. Maybe he used the same plea that woman used that killed somebody after going through a red light and whined about being too fat to go to prison. The next was a couple of Hunlings, making sick jokes about that girl that collapsed at a party. Again, they've got previous, doing the same thing about a baby that had been murdered. Nothing was done about them then and I wouldn't hold out much hope of anything being done about them now!

Lastly, I remember back in the 1980s, somebody at a tutorial at university asked me if I would sign their form to set up a Jewish Society. You needed so many people to sign up to get a society affiliated to the Students' Union and you'd get a small amount of funding as well. The girl told me that there weren't enough Jews at the university to sign. I thought there would be no harm in it and didn't think about it too long. My decision was made all the easier by the girl flashing me a large smile and a good view of her knockers as she leaned over the form. So I signed and that was the last I ever heard of it.

As far as I know, the Jewish Society signed up with the Students' Union, got their one-off grant and had a good piss-up; and the best of luck to them. If, however, this group had been out on campus making Zionist noises, burning Palestinian flags and the like, I'd have been straight over the SU office to demand that my name be removed forthwith.

It's the same thing now with the way Westminster is trying to pish all over the Scottish electorate. The Daily Record were all for 'The Vow' and even did their best to claim 'credit' for it. To me, it was a deciding factor in many people voting 'NO'. So why aren't they up in arms at the efforts to twist and mangle their precious 'Vow'? I was glancing through their website yesterday and, out of the corner of my eye, I spotted the words 'vow', 'truth' and 'expose'. At last, I thought; they're actually going to say something. It turned out that the headline really said, "Katie Price vows to expose 'truth' about Peter Andre when pair FINALLY meet in court". That, I suppose, sums things up.

And where's Gordon Brown disappeared to? Didn't he say he "would ensure the commitment given by the leaders of the three main Westminster parties is adhered to"? And didn't he say, "These are men who had been promise makers, and they will not be promise breakers, and I will ensure that these promises that have been made are upheld"? So where the hell is he? Come on, Mr Brown, don't be shy! You weren't so backward in coming forward in September, were you?

Sevco proudly parades Warburton's second signing:

Gael Bigirimana