SITUATIONS VACANT

Loony Leggat is still trying to play Morgan Le Fay to McMurdo's Merlin. In an insane rant yesterday he tries to make out that Jack Irvine is in bed with all the 'Rainjurz Haters' to destroy Bisto FC. So, in effect, what he is saying is that those in power at Ibrox are trying to destroy the club from within, since they are the ones employing Irvine. Now I've heard some crazy stuff from the Bisto Kids but that takes the biscuit! Why the hell would the Kray Brothers want to do that? They certainly don't want to do that; at least not before the gravy runs out!

Leggat bases his hatred of Irvine on his story of him calling John Greig 'thick.' I thought Leggat was supposed to have been a sports journalist; if he had been then surely he would know that Scottish footballers are not renowned for being bright. There's nobody like Albert Camus ever came from Scotland! Remember when you were at school and all the ones in the Under-15 B team would use football training as an excuse for not doing homework or not studying for a test. Most of them end up on the dole but a few manage to make it to the top; it doesn't make them any brighter though. Just listen to Sooperally, Charlie Nicholas, Barry Ferguson or, dare I say it, Neil Lennon and you will soon discover that none of them are going to be MENSA candidates anytime soon!

Leggat also goes on to accuse McMurdo of being 'anti-Dave King.' How the hell he makes that one out, I don't know! Auld Merlin has been beating the drum for The Messiah as much as the rest of them. It's getting ridiculous the way each side is trying to claim The Messiah as their own; it's like that scene in Life of Brian when they're all arguing about which items Brian's dropped that they should follow.

What McMurdo actually said was that he had heard that The Messiah was likely to be knocked back by AIM as well as the SFA. Cue the cries of 'Timmigrant SFA' from among the comments. Are these peeppell insane? The man's a convicted criminal, for God's sake! Any organisation worth its salt would see him as not being fit and proper, but they can only see it as being the work of 'Rainjurz Haters.' I take it the London Stock Exchange is full of 'timmigrants' and 'Rainjurz Haters' as well!

Yesterday I came across a website run by Chris Graham, the guy that wants to ban jelly and ice-cream and is one of the supporters of the Requisitioners, called 'The Rangers Standard.' There was an article by somebody called Scott Ferguson going on about how the Scottish media is full of  'anti-Rainjurz' lies. According to this character, the old days of integrity are gone. As usual, however, with this kind of stuff, the guy's full of shite. He alludes to the Leveson Inquiry and the scandals surrounding how newspapers have operated as evidence of this loss of integrity.

What this clown forgets, however, is that the enquiries and prosecutions relate to activities in the past, when Rangers were in the ascendancy. In that case, his arguments lead directly to the conclusion that all the fawning over David Murray and the constant positive spin about Rangers took place in an atmosphere of nationwide corruption in the media. Ergo, the stories put about back then were utter shite and the perception of 'Succulent Lamb' journalism is essentially true. Talk about being hoist with your own petard!

Meanwhile, Bisto FC has advertised for a new CEO to replace Mather. I suppose Stockbridge and Ronnie Kray must be getting lonely sitting at that board table just looking at each other! They are apparently looking for a "candidate of exceptional quality and experience" and someone with a "proven track record of success within sport". They're not asking for much, eh? I take it you need to bring your own spoon to sup up the gravy!

The best bit, though, is that they say the CEO's remit will include "liaising with the club's supporters, football authorities and shareholders." That'll take somebody of Solomon's stature to manage to liaise with that lot!

Of course, the story in the Daily Record prompted many humorous comments, my favourite of which was by somebody called Jon Bruce:

"Must have own Crombie coat and hair gel....margarine will do."

Finally, on a sad note, I think we all extend our sympathies and best wishes to Fernando Ricksen after the horrible news of his contracting motor-neurone disease.

"Right, what Ah'm gonny dae is cut Bisto FC in hauf an' yez kin baith get a bit each. Awright?"


P.S. You might find today's post on my other blog interesting.